It’s a longstanding phrase in advertising, “Sex Sells!” It sells things that have nothing to do with it whatsoever. Sex or the perception of sex has been used to advertise cigarettes, alcohol, deodorant, shampoo and so much more. The reason is that it works. If someone is able to link your desire for sex to their product, they’ve increased their chances of making a sale exponentially. So with this all in mind, I’m going to try to sell you on your best life in sexual terms. This sales pitch will start with the less desirable and move up from there.
Rape – Acting on your desires without any thought to the impact or desires of others is rape. You do things that you know are wrong but you just don’t care.
Fantasizing – All of the action happens inside your head and stays there. It’s perfect because it’s all imaginary. You can have anything that you want and be exactly how you want to be but in that moment, it’s just you ALONE!
Masturbation – Desire with a little action is masturbation. You’re one step up from fantasizing. You’re actually doing something that will produce a result. But let’s face it, you’re still alone and you’re still not doing what you really want to be doing.
One Night Stand – You’re another step up the ladder! You’ve gotten that thing that you’ve been hoping for. This is a good sign but you know it’s basically meaningless. A temporary band-aid over the bigger desire that you have.
Porn Sex – You’re doing something like what you want but you’re mainly showing off. You know there’s an audience and it’s obvious that this isn’t who you are. Once the spotlight is off of you, you’re going back to your normal life and it’s not as glamorous as you want it to be.
The F*#% Buddy – This is a comfortable situation. It’s meeting a good number of your desires and regularly enough that you don’t feel like you’re going without. It’s a good place to be but you know it can’t last forever and you’ve got needs on other levels that aren’t being met.
The Committed Relationship – This is where you want to be. It’s good for you and good for the people around you. There’s a compounding return on the weeks, months and years that you’ve put into this.
Now that we’ve defined the terms, let’s apply them to an area of one’s life. Let’s use personal fitness.
- A person who does not care about their fitness at all is raping themselves. Over and over acting only out of desire and never thinking of consequence.
- A person who sees fit people and thinks about how they could be or used to be is just fantasizing.
- The person who joined a gym but never goes or goes only when they feel like it is masturbating.
- Training for and running a 5K is a one night stand. It’s not going to last.
- Entering a fitness challenge at work is porn sex. Without the spotlight, it’s just not happening or at least not to the level that it is.
- Personally I’m in a F*#% buddy relationship with my fitness. I do it when I feel like it. I’m not committed to it. It’s convenient but not committed. I’m missing out on all of those connections that would take it to the next level.
- The fit person is in a committed relationship. Not particularly to the type of exercise that they do but rather to their body.
Apply these labels to any area of your life. It could help you to realize that you’re raping your career and you really don’t want to be anymore. No matter what your situation this is a tool to help you examine where you are and where you want to be. ENJOY!
Pete
If you’ve got suggestions for other possibilities, leave them in the comments.
At one point in my life, ketchup was not a condiment, it was an ingredient. Ketchup sandwiches were a staple of my diet. Any undesirable food such as broccoli could be made digestible with an ample serving of ketchup. Obviously this is not an ideal system for a balanced diet. It was more of a survival tactic for an extremely picky eater rather than a conscious decision about eating good food. Eventually I learned that ketchup was not the answer to all of my food issues. It wasn’t versatile enough to be an everyday ingredient.
Despite the extremely broad reach that the internet gives us, people seem to feel as though they are at the effect of their circumstances. If circumstances were what made people, then a frail asthmatic doesn’t become a president revered for his adventures. A stutterer doesn’t become one of the most recognizable voices of his era. And an actor with a partially paralyzed face doesn’t become the face of multiple film series. The truth is that we all know that circumstances are only part of the recipe. It is just easier to use poor circumstances as an excuse for poor results. Or a lack of resources as a reason for no results. You may not have everything you need to make today great but you have the most important thing and that is you. You’re the ingredient that you’ve been waiting for! If you’ll step up to the challenge and be what today needs.
In a world where almost anyone can have 1,000 or more followers, who is doing the leading? It seems as though there should be a connection between the two: leaders and followers. Unfortunately the act of following has such a low threshold for involvement that many have it as the default option. Following is easy, semi-rewarding and comes with little to no responsibility. The problem is that just because people are following, doesn’t mean that anyone intends to lead. Following the car in front of you is a good strategy if you’re going to the same place. It’s a horrible strategy if your intentions are different than the person you’re following. Leadership should be an intention, not meandering with followers in tow. So the question is, who should be a leader? You!
In the English subway system, there are both visual and auditory reminders to “Mind the Gap”. This is a call for attention to the space between the platform and the train. It is a helpful reminder but probably almost unnoticed by most local people. However for the American tourist this is an out of the ordinary bit of speech. “Mind” is rarely used as a verb in American English and “the gap” is a store or possibly brings thoughts of Michael Strahan. Due to its unique wording and situational use, it tends to have sticking power with tourists. It is helpful to “Mind the Gap”. While it is a everyday practicality in the UK, it seems as though there is a gap issue in the USA.
This morning on my run I had a glitch with my headphones. Only part of the sound was coming through. The guitars, bass and backing vocals all came through crystal clear while the drums and lead vocals were inaudible. Occasionally the vocals could be heard but only as a kind of echo. Each song that played was a muted version of what it normally is and those echoes were the only reminders of the lyrics of the normal song. The only song that came through relatively clearly was “Jane Says” by Jane’s Addiction because it was from live recording rather than a chopped studio version.
Distraction is a way of life in the country at the moment. Not only is completing tasks without getting distracted difficult but the fear of missing out (FOMO) seems to be an almost pervasive issue. People have divided their focus between too many activities and are simultaneously getting distracted from them. It’s a recipe for disaster no matter how you slice it. No one can be everywhere for everyone every time. Distraction always comes with a price tag and it is not you who is profiting. The losses are felt by you, your family, your friends, your colleagues and classmates. The people who are actually in your life are the ones who are missing out on a key component of their experience and that is you. All of you, not the partial you that has a technological device in hand “JUST IN CASE!” The cyborg version of you that cannot let go of the phone, tablet or computer has a distinct weakness, it is never fully present.
For the past six months or so, I’ve been learning Polish using a program called Duolingo. It is a completely free online language learning tool. I started using it to prove the point to my students that you can learn a foreign language by using such a tool. When summer hit, I took a Polish hiatus but now I’m back on the train. The funny thing is that I’m not sure that I’ll ever get to Poland. It is the homeland of my ancestors and I love to travel but it is not a huge priority. So then why bother to learn the language? There is no foreseeable return on my daily investment of time and energy into this language.
Huryk Unlimited 