It’s a longstanding phrase in advertising, “Sex Sells!” It sells things that have nothing to do with it whatsoever. Sex or the perception of sex has been used to advertise cigarettes, alcohol, deodorant, shampoo and so much more. The reason is that it works. If someone is able to link your desire for sex to their product, they’ve increased their chances of making a sale exponentially. So with this all in mind, I’m going to try to sell you on your best life in sexual terms. This sales pitch will start with the less desirable and move up from there.
Rape – Acting on your desires without any thought to the impact or desires of others is rape. You do things that you know are wrong but you just don’t care.
Fantasizing – All of the action happens inside your head and stays there. It’s perfect because it’s all imaginary. You can have anything that you want and be exactly how you want to be but in that moment, it’s just you ALONE!
Masturbation – Desire with a little action is masturbation. You’re one step up from fantasizing. You’re actually doing something that will produce a result. But let’s face it, you’re still alone and you’re still not doing what you really want to be doing.
One Night Stand – You’re another step up the ladder! You’ve gotten that thing that you’ve been hoping for. This is a good sign but you know it’s basically meaningless. A temporary band-aid over the bigger desire that you have.
Porn Sex – You’re doing something like what you want but you’re mainly showing off. You know there’s an audience and it’s obvious that this isn’t who you are. Once the spotlight is off of you, you’re going back to your normal life and it’s not as glamorous as you want it to be.
The F*#% Buddy – This is a comfortable situation. It’s meeting a good number of your desires and regularly enough that you don’t feel like you’re going without. It’s a good place to be but you know it can’t last forever and you’ve got needs on other levels that aren’t being met.
The Committed Relationship – This is where you want to be. It’s good for you and good for the people around you. There’s a compounding return on the weeks, months and years that you’ve put into this.
Now that we’ve defined the terms, let’s apply them to an area of one’s life. Let’s use personal fitness.
- A person who does not care about their fitness at all is raping themselves. Over and over acting only out of desire and never thinking of consequence.
- A person who sees fit people and thinks about how they could be or used to be is just fantasizing.
- The person who joined a gym but never goes or goes only when they feel like it is masturbating.
- Training for and running a 5K is a one night stand. It’s not going to last.
- Entering a fitness challenge at work is porn sex. Without the spotlight, it’s just not happening or at least not to the level that it is.
- Personally I’m in a F*#% buddy relationship with my fitness. I do it when I feel like it. I’m not committed to it. It’s convenient but not committed. I’m missing out on all of those connections that would take it to the next level.
- The fit person is in a committed relationship. Not particularly to the type of exercise that they do but rather to their body.
Apply these labels to any area of your life. It could help you to realize that you’re raping your career and you really don’t want to be anymore. No matter what your situation this is a tool to help you examine where you are and where you want to be. ENJOY!
If you’ve got suggestions for other possibilities, leave them in the comments.