Blogpost, self-reliance

Level Up Your Hero Game

We all have a hero living inside of ourselves. The question is not whether it is there. Almost always the question is the type of hero and when does they show up. A hero is defined as a person who is admired or idealized for courage, outstanding achievements, or noble qualities. We all have that possibility within us but not everyone is willing to live the hero life. Let’s start at the bottom and work our way up.

The Stillborn Hero – Just like everyone else, this person has greatness within them but either don’t know it or choose not to use it. These are the saddest people to meet because it’s plain to see that they have more inside. They just can’t or won’t access it.

The Reluctant Hero – This is the person who will only access that higher level of ability when it is forced upon them. They don’t want to do anything special because it’s too much of a hassle. When the circumstances are right, they’ll save the day but they’d rather be in their secret hideout with their sidekick relaxing.

The Self Aggrandizing Hero – Although they do some hero work, they make it sound much bigger than it is. Saving a kitten from a tree somehow gets translated into saving the world.

The Mercenary Hero – I’m not completely sure if this is where they belong on the scale. However these heroes have great abilities that people recognize and laud them for. Unfortunately they come with the understanding that they’ll get compensated for their hero work. They’re not a sucker. The skills that they have are not for free.

The Small Time Hero – This may be my favorite type of hero. Their contributions to the world are nothing spectacular but they consistently show up to do that which is required of them. They save the world one person at a time but do it in stride. They don’t think of themselves as heroes but they definitely are.

The Super Hero – This is the one that we tend to make movies about. While there are no supernatural abilities being thrown around, these are the people that we remember forever. They give something of themselves at such a level that they inspire other people to be a better version of themselves. They might get compensated for what they did but that’s not why they did it. They acted out of selflessness, patriotism, or any other noble cause.

All of these levels of hero have their flaws. Even the super hero in the real world has an addiction to chocolate or some other vice but they act as a hero enough for us to notice.

Each of us is on this spectrum someplace (or maybe I missed some in the middle). Regardless of where you stand at the moment, do your best to level up! There is nothing wrong with staying where you are but if you didn’t notice, the world is hurting at the moment. The world could use a few more heroes. It doesn’t need to be every moment of every day. You can do your hero work in fits and starts. Do it at times where no one expects it. So as you go through your day today, look for opportunities to HERO UP! They’re all around you. Don’t wait for a spotlight in the sky because that’s impractical. Keep your eyes open for the people who need your special skill because they are out there. Villains can take care of themselves, the heroes need to step up for one another.

HERO UP!

Pete

Blogpost, self-reliance

How to be a superhero TODAY!

Superheroes vary in size, powers, intelligence many other factors. However there are some generalizations that we can make about superheroes. These will not be all encompassing but they are useful for a conversation.

  1. Superheroes (generally) put the good of the masses/others above their own.
  2. Superheroes are held in high esteem by people.
  3. Superheroes often have a secret identity that keeps them from getting “credit”.
  4. Superheroes have an origin story. It’s usually not a happy tale.
  5. Superheroes have flaws or something that undermines their power (kryptonite).
  6. Superheroes have a special power or powers.

So if you look up and down that list, it’s possible that you’ve already seen what I want you to see. The difference between a superhero and you is not radiation, toxic waste, better parents or anything of the sort. The difference comes down to basically two major ingredients: decisions and perspective.

Your decisions are the major difference between you and a superhero at this moment. Someone can choose to be more than halfway to superhero status simply by making a few changes.

  1. Choosing to put the good of others above your own is something that you can choose to do today. It does not have to be the world or a nation or a city. It could be your family or friends.
  2. By making that decision, it is highly probable that people will hold you in high esteem.
  3. It completely possible for you to do good for other people who will never know your name or possibly even ever see you act. Despite the fact that credit feels good, it is completely possible to feel good without the credit.
  4. Your story is good enough as it is. You can decide to do great things today. The radioactive spider or near death experience are not necessary. Start where you are and figure out the story later.
  5. Each of us has our flaws and most likely you’re judging yourself harshly for yours. Would you judge Superman for being weakened by Kryptonite? Even better for you is that you can work on your flaws.
  6. This final piece is one of perception. What do you perceive as special? Again, due to your proximity to yourself, you have most likely undervalued one or more of your abilities. My mother is an exceptional baker. That can be a super power when given the correct perspective and leverage. If you don’t have that thing yet, there is no reason why you can’t develop it.

Decisions and perspective are the obstacles between you and being a superhero. You can start your journey today! No one can stop you! The number of super villains in your world is probably pretty low. So get started today!

Have a super day!

Pete

Blogpost

Facing The Super Villains

SuperVillainsMarvel and DC have been churning out movies for years now.  For many reasons, the Marvel Universe is leading the charge in this genre.  One of the main reasons is that they don’t just have the heroes face the obvious Super Villains.  They also continually show their heroes struggle with the more difficult Super Villains that are hiding within themselves.  Whether it is Tony Stark battling his own ego, need for control and alcoholism* or Captain America’s conflicting values of friendship with right and wrong; these are all battles that we as mere mortals can relate to.  So what do you do when the enemy that you must face resides within you?  Identify your foe.  This is usually the most difficult step.

It’s easy to identify an alien invasion through a wormhole in the sky above New York.  It’s a problem that needs immediate attention and the longer that you ignore it, the worse it gets.  Often the same is true of our internal Super Villains but since they reside within us, we excuse them or think that they’re the reason we got this far in the first place.  Regardless of the story that we tell ourselves, they are nevertheless an enemy.  And you’ll need to do battle.  Battling the villain inside is the more difficult and subtle battle.  Drop a nuclear bomb on that villain and the hero dies too which is not what we’re looking for at all.  So it requires deliberate thought and often daily work.  Some of these villains can be tamed but others must be destroyed.  So it is important to remember that you’re a starfish!

Of course I only mean this in the metaphorical sense.  In reality, starfish can regrow parts of their anatomy that are cut off.  In the practical sense for us, this is also true.  You can “cut off” a band habit, poor thought pattern or addiction BUT something is going to grow back in its place.  If you’re not deliberate about replacing it with something more constructive, the villain will come back and be stronger.  So as you are doing battle with those things that you want to change about yourself, have a plan to replace them.  None of this is easy but it is necessary to get you to the super hero status that you deserve.  And that is usually first battle that people have to fight, BELIEVE THAT YOU ARE SPECIAL IN SOME WAY AND DESERVE BETTER.  You won’t sprout wings tomorrow but maybe you can find another way to fly!

Suit up!  And fight the good fight!

Pete

 

Blogpost, self-reliance

Creating Your Origin Story

Spider-man-origins-1-1024x512They are everywhere at the moment.  With the explosion of the Marvel movies, Silicon Valley startups and overnight superstars plucked from the internet; origin stories are all around us.  All of them, to a certain extent, are made up.  The comic book authors crafted those of the super heroes.  The others that exist in the real world cannot tell the story of every little thing that happened.  So they have to delete and adjust to a narrative that aligns with how they want to be seen by the outside world or by themselves.  Since all origin stories are created in one fashion or another, it may be helpful for your daily life to fashion your own.  Not pluck it out of thin air but rather weave some real events of your life in with a narrative that propels you forward.

My origin story goes something like this.  When I was 12 years old, soccer was definitely my fall sport.  However at that time, the term “travel soccer” had not really grabbed hold.  In fact, this was the first year in which my town participated in what we referred to as “spring soccer”.  My younger brother was going to play for the spring team at his age group and my father was going to help coach.  Unfortunately I had either missed the tryouts for my age group or there just weren’t any.  Regardless, the first day of practice came along for my brother’s team.  They were sharing a field with the team for age group right above mine.  I knew most of the players from school.  Although the team was already formed, I decided that I was going to get onto that team.  At that moment, I did the only thing that I could think of to get the attention of the coach.  I RAN!  Rather than sitting and watching my brother’s practice, I started running laps around the field where they were practicing.    For the entire 90 minute practice, I kept running around the field.  When my father and brother were finished, we packed up and went home.  Some time around 9pm the phone rang.  It was the coach of that older team, they wanted me to play for the team.  That was the beginning of who I became.  Someone willing to go the distance and use unique solutions to problems.

If you notice as you read that story, it all fits together relatively well.  It’s been 30 years since those events and I could not tell you definitively if that story is 100% accurate.  All of those events definitely happened.  However I’m not sure if there was a player who broke their leg, so they needed someone else.  Perhaps the call from the coach came a week later.  In the end, those detail DO NOT MATTER.  What truly matters is that the story fits my beliefs about who I am and who I want to be.  The event was chosen but the story was “created” because I want to see myself in a particular way.  I have millions of other events that have happened in my life.  I could have easily chosen to create my origin story using a huge failure and rehearsed an excuse around why I could never be a success because of “that thing that happened”.  People do it all the time.  The question that is most important for me about origin stories is, does it serve you?  Is your origin story going to make you or break you?

If it is not going to help, then change it!  Your life story is not objective truth.  It is a jumble of memories that have been given varying degrees of clarity and importance.  So decide on a moment in your life that can act as a catapult for the days that are coming.  It doesn’t need to be something from your childhood.  It could be this moment right now!  “I read this great blogpost about origin stories and I didn’t like mine.  So right then and there I decided that I was going to take action.  I….”  One of the main things about life is how you feel about yourself when you are alone and have a moment to reflect.  If you don’t feel good about yourself, then change your story.  Even Darth Vader was able to redeem himself, why can’t you?

Write the story that you want people to read about you!

Pete

Blogpost, self-reliance

Small Time Heroes

GrootMarvel and DC have had a long term duopoly on the Super Hero.  They’ve got teenagers bitten by radioactive spiders all the way to a billionaire orphan vigilante.  These characters have been cultural mainstays for decades with their popularity reaching a crescendo at the moment with big budget movies.  These heroes capture the imagination because of their exceptional abilities.  Each has their personal foibles but in the end the world depends on them to put things right in extreme situations.

There are two problems with the Super Hero though.  First, the world is very rarely in the kind of peril that requires Super Heroes.  Second, they’re not real!  Even the Super Heroes, with no super powers whatsoever, bend all kinds of rules of reality.  So if we don’t have those big problems and these individuals don’t exist, why are we so obsessed?

It is really quite simple.  Super Heroes are a distraction.  A way for us to be let off of the hook.  Since I’m not able to do anything EXTRAordinary, I only need to do the ordinary.  Being a hero is just too far out of reach because I don’t have a magical hammer, futuristic body armor or a utility belt.  It’s just me!  What can I do?

You can be a small time hero!  You just need to do a little more than the ordinary person and that by definition makes you EXTRAordinary.  Be a little kinder.  Be a little more resilient.  Be a little more intelligent.  Love your family a little more.  BUT what difference will that make?  Almost none.

UNTIL a few people around you catch on.  Then it has the possibility of developing super power.  Because small time heroes stacking up their little powers together becomes a force multiplier.  It’s not particularly easy!  Nor is it blockbuster movie worthy but it really is the only way.  Super Heroes are not coming!  The people in “power” generally worry about two things: keeping the power they have and leveraging it to their own ends.  So it is up to us, the small time heroes to save the world from………us!  Go suit up!

Have a great day!
Pete

 

 

self-reliance, Uncategorized

Mediocrity Man

lhvmarathon-e1497924664977.jpgHollywood is regularly churning out super hero movies and their sequels. At the moment they seem to be almost a sure thing at the box office. Iron Man, Spider Man, Batman and Captain America all seem to capture the imagination of the people as they pay big movie theater prices to see these super humans. It is obvious that “super” is what the people want to see.

What if there was a hero named Mediocrity Man? He had super powers that were inside of him but he was afraid of them. Any time that he saw himself do something out of the ordinary, he would instantly recoil and deny his abilities. Rather than keeping his secret identity from everyone else, he would hide or deny his powers to himself. What if Clark Kent never changed into Superman? Would you watch that movie? Of course not.

If this hero existed, why would he hide his powers? The reasons would be the same that you or I don’t do the things that would produce greatness.

  • It’s too hard.
  • It will take too long.
  • I might not succeed.
  • Or worse, I might succeed and the people would expect more out of me.
  • I don’t want people to make fun of me.
  • No one in my family, town, state or country has ever done it before, who am I to be first?

Imagine the Earth being filled with superheroes. What if people were getting most out of themselves every single day? What would that look like? I’ve been Mediocrity Man. I’ve traded in my cape for a t-shirt on a regular basis. Feeling comfortable in the cape is difficult because I know all of my faults, all of my weaknesses and every way that I have ever screwed up. The hero in the movie never falls for long. He gets his super powers and continues on until the world is safe again. For us regular heroes, it’s not a magic movie moment involving a radioactive spider or the destruction of Krypton that begins our ascent. It’s a consistent decision to be the best form of ourselves.