Tag: humanity

Uncategorized

The Shoehorn, the Crowbar and Bulldozer

Pete Huryk

ShoehornThe shoehorn*, crowbar and bulldozer; all use a combination of an inclined plan and a lever.  While they all have the same base components, almost no one would ever use one as a replacement for the other.  Using a bulldozer to get your shoes on could get messy really quickly!  It’s overkill and everyone can see that.

As we go through the tumultuous times in our lives, it can seem easiest to bulldoze through challenges.  As the “pressure” of daily life seems to be getting higher, bulldozing can become the default lever that people use to move forward.  In the end this leaves a flattened earth with nothing living left behind.  People are especially susceptible to being hurt in the process of bulldozing.  Getting what you want from a personal situation is usually better served by using a delicate tool rather than a massively destructive one.  In a world where we’ve become comfortable with possible heart attack from a drug intended to length your eyelashes (tongue in cheek), it might be that our tolerance for negative consequence has gotten too high.

Choose the right tool for the situation.  Damage control is not something to be done after the fact.  It can be done beforehand with even better results.  Exercise your leverage without the destruction.

Pete

*A shoehorn may not be something that young people recognize.   It is a tool that is used to help slide a shoe onto a foot.  They used to be prevalent but I’ve not seen one since my grandfather passed away.

Uncategorized

Check the Ingredients

Pete Huryk

IngredientsAt one point in my life, ketchup was not a condiment, it was an ingredient.  Ketchup sandwiches were a staple of my diet.  Any undesirable food such as broccoli could be made digestible with an ample serving of ketchup.  Obviously this is not an ideal system for a balanced diet.  It was more of a survival tactic for an extremely picky eater rather than a conscious decision about eating good food.  Eventually I learned that ketchup was not the answer to all of my food issues.  It wasn’t versatile enough to be an everyday ingredient.

When putting together the ingredients for a great day, it is easy to think of all of the garnishes and forget about the main ingredient.  If asked what are the ingredients to a great day, what would you say?  Sunshine, a beach, friends, family, food, and drink are all things that I typically hear.  People usually don’t lead off with the number one ingredient to every day of their life.  You are the only person that will be there every single moment of every single day of your life.  So shouldn’t you be the first and most important ingredient regardless of all of the garnishes.  No matter the other circumstances that surround you, you should be the ingredient that defines the dish.

JamesEarlJonesDespite the extremely broad reach that the internet gives us, people seem to feel as though they are at the effect of their circumstances.  If circumstances were what made people, then a frail asthmatic doesn’t become a president revered for his adventures.  A stutterer doesn’t become one of the most recognizable voices of his era.  And an actor with a partially paralyzed face doesn’t become the face of multiple film series.  The truth is that we all know that circumstances are only part of the recipe.  It is just easier to use poor circumstances as an excuse for poor results.  Or a lack of resources as a reason for no results.  You may not have everything you need to make today great but you have the most important thing and that is you.  You’re the ingredient that you’ve been waiting for!  If you’ll step up to the challenge and be what today needs.

Go be the best you today!

Pete

 

 

Blogpost, self-reliance

The Worst of the Best

Pete Huryk

KeanuTo a certain extent, I feel like I’m in therapy or at an AA meeting about to admit one of my biggest weaknesses but here it goes: I like a lot of Keanu Reeves’ movies.  It really shouldn’t be that embarrassing because the man’s movies have made millions (maybe billions) over the years.  Unfortunately he gets a bad rap because he’s pretty goofy and doesn’t have a lot of range.  The interesting thing is that for the most part, this anti-Keanu sentiment comes from people who have never acted before and have paid to see his movies.  So is it really that he is THAT bad?  Or do people simply have a need to pick apart a mediocre swan because it’s easier than looking in the water to see an ugly duckling reflected back?

While wading through all of the photos, videos, memes, tweets and posts, it is possible that some of us get a little judgmental.  It’s easy to forget when looking at a screen that the people on the other side are human.  They have hopes, fears, idiosyncrasies, habits and faults.  These are all things that we expect from the people that we are close to.  However when looking at people on social media or especially people in the spotlight, all understanding goes out the window.  The best of the best need to be as close to infallible as possible.  If they fall anywhere short of that standard, then we of the judging majority can swoop in to point out their shortcoming.

But it is not the critic who counts*.  The internet has given each of us a voice.  That voice should be used to make your own special contribution to the world.  Not to tear down that of another.  The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena*.  So take that chance to put your own stamp on the world.  Don’t worry about the haters because even Keanu has got them.  Would you rather be the worst of the best or the best of the worst?  Put another way.  Would you rather have produced something that wasn’t great?  Or never produced anything but gotten really good at calling out other people’s failures?  One’s easy and one’s hard but the decision should be obvious.

Go make something happen.  Let someone else do the criticizing.

Action!

Pete

*Lines from Teddy Roosevelt’s speech at the Sorbonne.

Uncategorized

Leaders and Followers

Pete Huryk

LeadButtonIn a world where almost anyone can have 1,000 or more followers, who is doing the leading?  It seems as though there should be a connection between the two: leaders and followers.  Unfortunately the act of following has such a low threshold for involvement that many have it as the default option.  Following is easy, semi-rewarding and comes with little to no responsibility.  The problem is that just because people are following, doesn’t mean that anyone intends to lead.  Following the car in front of you is a good strategy if you’re going to the same place.  It’s a horrible strategy if your intentions are different than the person you’re following.  Leadership should be an intention, not meandering with followers in tow.  So the question is, who should be a leader?  You!

You should be a leader of at least one person if not more.  Leadership is needed now probably more than ever before in the history of the world.  The reason that leadership is in such high demand is because we as a people got so damn good at following.  We’ve become so exceedingly talented at following that we barely recognize our power to lead.  That power starts with you and your choices.  Are you leading your own life or following the rules, path or suggestions from someone else?  There is nothing wrong with following the path, if it leads where you want to go.  The issue comes from following out of complacency, fear or doubt.  These are not usually the emotions that cause greatness.

Desire, courage and self-belief are the kindling that begin the fires of greatness.  We were all meant to be leaders of at least one person.  Lead yourself in the direction that you most desire to go.  Have the courage to take steps forward.  Believe in your ability to string enough of those steps together to succeed.  Perhaps when you’ve developed the leadership muscle enough, you’ll be ready to take on followers.  Just make sure that they are following you with intention.

Pete

Good song below!

 

Uncategorized

Completely Focused On Being Scattered

Pete Huryk

In 1925 President Calvin Coolidge famously said that “The business of America is business.”  Almost a full century later, those words are still quoted often enough for it to be recognized.  Since the proliferation of the internet to most households, the pace of information exchange and communication has continued to increase almost exponentially.  The problem is that with so much information flying around, very few people are taking the time to communicate or do anything to the best of their ability.  It seems that with technology as our guide “The business of America is BUSYness.”   There is no soap box under my feet.  I am not chastising, judging or pointing a ridiculing finger.  This post is as much for me as it is for anyone who reads it.

focusDistraction is a way of life in the country at the moment.  Not only is completing tasks without getting distracted difficult but the fear of missing out (FOMO) seems to be an almost pervasive issue.  People have divided their focus between too many activities and are simultaneously getting distracted from them.  It’s a recipe for disaster no matter how you slice it.  No one can be everywhere for everyone every time.  Distraction always comes with a price tag and it is not you who is profiting.  The losses are felt by you, your family, your friends, your colleagues and classmates.  The people who are actually in your life are the ones who are missing out on a key component of their experience and that is you.  All of you, not the partial you that has a technological device in hand “JUST IN CASE!”  The cyborg version of you that cannot let go of the phone, tablet or computer has a distinct weakness, it is never fully present.

So many of our systems are built largely upon attendance but that model is at best flawed and at worst catastrophically broken. Absence, attendance, presence, engagement and immersion are very different levels of an inverted pyramid of human involvement.  While attendance is a nice start, it is just barely above absence and meets only minimum requirements.  Showing up is just not enough.  To really take full advantage of this life that you have been gifted, you must strategically move up the pyramid with the things that you have decided really matter.  And there lies the problem we must DECIDE.  Decide comes from the Latin meaning to cut off.   We must cut off the things that don’t matter in order to preserve the things that do.    Our focus needs to be cut down to that which we value most.

The only person who can win this focus battle for you is you.  Anyone can suggest, plead or punish you to do it but you do not have to comply until you choose.  In the end there are so many companies and individuals who want your focus.  It is your job to divvy it out as you see fit or scatter it without a care.  Where you put your focus determines your life.  If you decide to immerse yourself in Facebook, that is your choice and far be it from me to judge.  As long as it is a decision and not a resignation to the world of distraction.  Choose what you want for yourself before others choose for you.

Pete

Do what you can, with what you have, where you are.  -Theodore Roosevelt

Uncategorized

The Air Conditioning Farce

Pete Huryk

heatIn these hot summer days of New Jersey, an air conditioned house, store or office is a sanctuary.  Relief from the pounding heat and humidity seems as if it is a necessity.  I often think about our “pre-AC” ancestors and how they reacted to days like this.  Most likely, they had to be slightly more intelligent about breaks, shade and water.  The prospect of artificial cool was long off in the future.  Like so many of our modern conveniences, the advancement of technology seems to come attached to a double result: the desired effect and it’s opposite.

An air conditioner is thought of as a cooling mechanism, unless you visit the back end of the unit.  There you will realize that the AC unit is producing almost as much heat as cold.  So the cool factor is for a selected space and temporary.  When the heat and cool reunite, the entire equation is most likely a wash.   The effect for us as the recipients is not particularly a wash.  The perception of cool and hot becomes skewed.  While we have in theory “beaten the heat” by creating air conditioning, we’ve made ourselves less able to adapt to it when it is thrust upon us.  This inverse relationship is evident in many areas.  The internet has connected us all but we are losing our ability to communicate.  Everyone has a phone in their pocket but people are talking less.  We have more information than ever about the human body and how it works best but obesity and diabetes are rampant.  It is as if we have forgotten something that could bring us back to the center.  The thing that we have forgotten is that we are animals.  Specifically we are mammals who were intended to find an equilibrium with our surroundings in order to survive.

The technological advances that we have created have brought us off of our center where we feel like we need to adapt.  The world is supposed to adapt to us, right?  Not quite, when we forget our heritage, not too subtle reminders will be visited upon us.  So my message is pretty simple: Find out, without!  Find out who you are without all of the gadgets that you use to cause comfort.  Think, plan and execute some time in an outdoor environment that slightly tests who you are as a human animal.  An overnight hike, a day without air conditioning, a period of time with no cell phone or any other exercise that allows you to come back to a natural center.  (Yes!  I realize that I’m asking you to unplug while writing an article over the internet.  Hypocrisy?  Only if I did this without doing what I prescribe.)

So find out, without!  Find out whether or not you can have a face to face conversation with one of your Facebook friends.  Find out if you really would shrivel up in this heat or do you just need to have a plan for hydration and find shade.  The human animal has conquered this world and found now that his biggest adversary is himself.  Don’t get crushed by your comfort!

See you along the path!

Pete

 

Uncategorized

Invisible People

Pete Huryk

InvisibleAs a teacher, I take pride in the fact that I learn all of my students’ first and/or last name within the first three days of class.  Learning the names of over 100 people in that amount of time is not always easy but it is good for building a rapport with people.  There are plenty of tricks to acquiring information that quickly.  Unfortunately the honest truth is that I don’t remember all of the names after the year is over.  The other day a former student came to visit and it took about five minutes for me to remember her first name.  While I’m not proud of this event, I don’t feel all that badly about it either.  The information was in there but just not near the top of the filing system.  I feel much worse when I first meet someone and less than a minute later, I don’t remember their name.

There are many reasons why this happens but a major one is that new people aren’t usually important to us yet.  In English class you may remember your teacher talking about the “first person”, “second person” and “third person”.  That basically represents the way that we used to define people’s importance.  In a pre-technology world, the most important person in our lives was ‘self’.  This was followed by the people we had contact with directly.  Finally there was the rest of the world that held up that third position.  Now there is a third class of people, invisible.

Invisible people are all around us.  Of course they’re not truly invisible.  We can see them if we look hard enough.  The reason we usually don’t see them is because we’re looking at our phone, TV or tablet.  In theory these should be “third person”, people that are there but you are not directly interacting with.  The problem is that position has now been replaced by the “second person”.  These are the people that we are in direct contact with but today they are almost universally ignored in favor of the digital.  The digital second person is basically the default contact that we reach to before anyone else.  For some, it seems as though all people have become invisible people.

So this weekend, give life back to the invisible people.  Take the time to see who is there.  Engage with people you know and don’t know on human level.  Remember that a hug is better than text.  A smile is better than a like.  Time with an old friend is better than a new Facebook friend.  Technology is a tool just like a hammer.  Used correctly, both are intended to build.  Used incorrectly, both have the possibility to destroy.  Be human this weekend and visit with the invisible people.