It’s a longstanding phrase in advertising, “Sex Sells!” It sells things that have nothing to do with it whatsoever. Sex or the perception of sex has been used to advertise cigarettes, alcohol, deodorant, shampoo and so much more. The reason is that it works. If someone is able to link your desire for sex to their product, they’ve increased their chances of making a sale exponentially. So with this all in mind, I’m going to try to sell you on your best life in sexual terms. This sales pitch will start with the less desirable and move up from there.
Rape – Acting on your desires without any thought to the impact or desires of others is rape. You do things that you know are wrong but you just don’t care.
Fantasizing – All of the action happens inside your head and stays there. It’s perfect because it’s all imaginary. You can have anything that you want and be exactly how you want to be but in that moment, it’s just you ALONE!
Masturbation – Desire with a little action is masturbation. You’re one step up from fantasizing. You’re actually doing something that will produce a result. But let’s face it, you’re still alone and you’re still not doing what you really want to be doing.
One Night Stand – You’re another step up the ladder! You’ve gotten that thing that you’ve been hoping for. This is a good sign but you know it’s basically meaningless. A temporary band-aid over the bigger desire that you have.
Porn Sex – You’re doing something like what you want but you’re mainly showing off. You know there’s an audience and it’s obvious that this isn’t who you are. Once the spotlight is off of you, you’re going back to your normal life and it’s not as glamorous as you want it to be.
The F*#% Buddy – This is a comfortable situation. It’s meeting a good number of your desires and regularly enough that you don’t feel like you’re going without. It’s a good place to be but you know it can’t last forever and you’ve got needs on other levels that aren’t being met.
The Committed Relationship – This is where you want to be. It’s good for you and good for the people around you. There’s a compounding return on the weeks, months and years that you’ve put into this.
Now that we’ve defined the terms, let’s apply them to an area of one’s life. Let’s use personal fitness.
- A person who does not care about their fitness at all is raping themselves. Over and over acting only out of desire and never thinking of consequence.
- A person who sees fit people and thinks about how they could be or used to be is just fantasizing.
- The person who joined a gym but never goes or goes only when they feel like it is masturbating.
- Training for and running a 5K is a one night stand. It’s not going to last.
- Entering a fitness challenge at work is porn sex. Without the spotlight, it’s just not happening or at least not to the level that it is.
- Personally I’m in a F*#% buddy relationship with my fitness. I do it when I feel like it. I’m not committed to it. It’s convenient but not committed. I’m missing out on all of those connections that would take it to the next level.
- The fit person is in a committed relationship. Not particularly to the type of exercise that they do but rather to their body.
Apply these labels to any area of your life. It could help you to realize that you’re raping your career and you really don’t want to be anymore. No matter what your situation this is a tool to help you examine where you are and where you want to be. ENJOY!
Pete
If you’ve got suggestions for other possibilities, leave them in the comments.
At one point in my life, ketchup was not a condiment, it was an ingredient. Ketchup sandwiches were a staple of my diet. Any undesirable food such as broccoli could be made digestible with an ample serving of ketchup. Obviously this is not an ideal system for a balanced diet. It was more of a survival tactic for an extremely picky eater rather than a conscious decision about eating good food. Eventually I learned that ketchup was not the answer to all of my food issues. It wasn’t versatile enough to be an everyday ingredient.
Despite the extremely broad reach that the internet gives us, people seem to feel as though they are at the effect of their circumstances. If circumstances were what made people, then a frail asthmatic doesn’t become a president revered for his adventures. A stutterer doesn’t become one of the most recognizable voices of his era. And an actor with a partially paralyzed face doesn’t become the face of multiple film series. The truth is that we all know that circumstances are only part of the recipe. It is just easier to use poor circumstances as an excuse for poor results. Or a lack of resources as a reason for no results. You may not have everything you need to make today great but you have the most important thing and that is you. You’re the ingredient that you’ve been waiting for! If you’ll step up to the challenge and be what today needs.
To a certain extent, I feel like I’m in therapy or at an AA meeting about to admit one of my biggest weaknesses but here it goes: I like a lot of Keanu Reeves’ movies. It really shouldn’t be that embarrassing because the man’s movies have made millions (maybe billions) over the years. Unfortunately he gets a bad rap because he’s pretty goofy and doesn’t have a lot of range. The interesting thing is that for the most part, this anti-Keanu sentiment comes from people who have never acted before and have paid to see his movies. So is it really that he is THAT bad? Or do people simply have a need to pick apart a mediocre swan because it’s easier than looking in the water to see an ugly duckling reflected back?
In a world where almost anyone can have 1,000 or more followers, who is doing the leading? It seems as though there should be a connection between the two: leaders and followers. Unfortunately the act of following has such a low threshold for involvement that many have it as the default option. Following is easy, semi-rewarding and comes with little to no responsibility. The problem is that just because people are following, doesn’t mean that anyone intends to lead. Following the car in front of you is a good strategy if you’re going to the same place. It’s a horrible strategy if your intentions are different than the person you’re following. Leadership should be an intention, not meandering with followers in tow. So the question is, who should be a leader? You!
The sport of skiing is one that I did not acquire until I was well into my twenties. My wife took me for the first time while we were engaged. I enjoy it but because I learned to ski later in life, I feel a certain amount of hesitance about pushing my limits. Skiing is an activity that allows for a good amount of self-policing. Generally speaking, there are no official representatives of the mountain telling you what trails to take. You need to have enough self-awareness to know if you’re a green circle, a blue square or a black diamond. Incorrectly gauging your level could have disastrous consequences. Despite this possible peril, most people make it down the mountain unscathed because they accurately police themselves.
In the English subway system, there are both visual and auditory reminders to “Mind the Gap”. This is a call for attention to the space between the platform and the train. It is a helpful reminder but probably almost unnoticed by most local people. However for the American tourist this is an out of the ordinary bit of speech. “Mind” is rarely used as a verb in American English and “the gap” is a store or possibly brings thoughts of Michael Strahan. Due to its unique wording and situational use, it tends to have sticking power with tourists. It is helpful to “Mind the Gap”. While it is a everyday practicality in the UK, it seems as though there is a gap issue in the USA.
This morning on my run I had a glitch with my headphones. Only part of the sound was coming through. The guitars, bass and backing vocals all came through crystal clear while the drums and lead vocals were inaudible. Occasionally the vocals could be heard but only as a kind of echo. Each song that played was a muted version of what it normally is and those echoes were the only reminders of the lyrics of the normal song. The only song that came through relatively clearly was “Jane Says” by Jane’s Addiction because it was from live recording rather than a chopped studio version.
Each of us has a potential amount of fire power in a given year. If you think of your energy to finish projects as gunpowder, some of us have a barrel full and others could barely fill one of those Chinese novelty snap pellets. While knowing how much powder you have is helpful, it is also important to divvy it up intelligently. Even the barrel-full may not be sufficient if divided a thousand times and put into the wrong weapons. By contrast, an intelligently used pinch could be life-changing. So how much firepower do you really have and where are you going to use it?
At the end of this year will you be basking in the glory of your successful hunt? Or will you be left standing with your Red Ryder Carbine in denial that you’re full of hot (but compressed) air? That’s completely up to you and it starts right now. Pick out your targets, if you haven’t already. Write them down and decide how you will take them down. Although truly ‘How’ is very rarely the problem. It is usually getting the focus and commitment to the target that people fail to do. So write them down now!
Once you have your targets, then you can plan out how to systematically deal with each one. It’s a simple enough process once you commit to it. What you need to do is “fall back on superior firepower and superior intelligence. And that’s all she wrote!”
It’s a throwaway line from Star Wars: A New Hope. The purists will point out that the actual line is “This R2 Unit has a bad motivator!” but either way it is enough to stop the red droid in his tracks. At that point, it’s back in the sand crawler with the Jawas. There is something all too familiar about this situation. At times motivation seems like an illusive force that some people have the power to wield while others struggle to find it. There is nothing supernatural about it. The reason to do or not do something (don’t get me started on trying) is a mixture of chemicals that are released in our brains and the story that we tell ourselves. So if you’re not doing something that you want to (or know that you should), it’s because you’ve got a bad motivator.
It’s January 9th and the gyms are getting less crowded by the day. The “Gymcensus” is almost over. With the holiday season having just ended, the story behind Christmas should be in mind but I’ll recap just in case. The story of Christmas starts with Joseph bringing Mary, his betrothed, to Bethlehem to be counted for the census. Due to the large influx of people, Joseph and a very pregnant Mary were forced to stay in a stable because there was no room at the inn. In that stable Jesus was born. Then he and his family had to flee in order escape the wrath of King Herod who intended to kill the child. Now we have created the modern equivalent.
Huryk Unlimited 