Last night, I read some really exciting news! Brian White was named to the roster for the US Men’s National Team’s camp this January. While he was in high school, I was lucky enough to coach Brian. His success on the field has everything to do with his choices and dedication to his craft as a player. I am extremely proud of him for all of his achievements, not only because he is a great player but also a great person. However, that pride as a coach is not restricted to Brian and his very public achievement. I am also extremely proud of Mitch, Thomas, Mason, Joe, Trey, Julie, Adrienne, Sarah, Mike M., Mike A., Jeremy and the list goes on. There is so much pride in my almost quarter century coaching career and very little of it has to do with kicking a ball.
During the end of season banquet one year, I was asked to “say a few words.” We had an extremely successful season and that was an amazing ride. However, the theme of my words were that the success of coaching was not to be measured in the wins that we had achieved that season but rather the successful marriages, careers, lives, etc. that would come ten or twenty years down the road.
The coach’s conundrum (for me at least) is that we want to win the game but we know that game isn’t what matters. Wanting to win is important. Preparing in order to win is important. Not because the game is a matter of life and death. But because the game helps us toward better results in life before our death. Through sport, we learn how to give our all, hopefully in service of something bigger than ourselves, for a finite amount of time. Years of practice, hopefully, lead to progress and mastery. Not only of the skills required to play because those are largely fleeting but the intangibles that come with sport. The results of any individual contest are nowhere near as important as the ripples that sports create through a lifetime of endeavors that require commitment.
Like Ted Lasso tells his son in the first season, being a coach is a lot like being a dad (or mom). It requires a letting go of the control one might want on the result. The strength of a good coach or parent is in the preparation and the long term impact. Some do it without realizing and others are intentional about their influence. Neither is easy and people get it wrong all the time. Especially, when we tend to focus on the things that are fleeting rather than the ones that are lasting.
Wanting good things for my players is a constant and trying to prepare them for the trials that they’ll face outside of the lines is as well. I’ve not done it perfectly because no one can but I’ve done it with intention. All around the world there are people that I had the privilege to influence for a short period of time and I hope that I helped nudge them closer to whom they were meant to be.
Two things! Thanks for reading and check out my book that explains finances using soccer as a metaphor.
Pete
Huryk Unlimited 