Month: November 2022

Blogpost, self-reliance

Toe Pick!

Pete Huryk

It is one of my guilty pleasures that only a few people know about. One of the movies that I’ve watched the most in my life is “The Cutting Edge”. Released in 1992, it is the story of a hockey player who has his career cut short by an eye injury and figure skater known for chasing away partners. In the end, it’s an opposites attract love story that is formulaic in all of the right ways. As the two main characters start skating together, Doug (the hockey player) keeps getting tripped up by a feature of the figure skates that he’s not accustomed to being there, the toe pick. Whenever he trips and falls, his unforgiving new partner points out his failure by saying “toe pick!” As they begin to build a working relationship, Kate (the figure skater) agrees to play a game of hockey against Doug. With the tables turned and her weaknesses exploited, she gets extremely frustrated and hits a slap shot that hits Doug in the face. At the hospital, Kate’s coach points out that she has finally found a partner. When Doug is brought out in a wheelchair with his entire head bandaged, he pulls them off to reveal a black eye and says “toe pick!”

Despite the predictability, I love this movie! It’s simple and hits all of the right buttons. Not least of which is a concept that so many of us need to embrace, getting past the toe pick. We’ve all got them. Those little annoyances that we wish were not there. They trip us up and we lament them because they are just in the way. In truth the toe pick is what allows a figure skater to jump and do other tricks that they could not do otherwise. The obstacle that stops Doug in the beginning eventually allows him to fly through the air.

The impediments in our lives are often more complex than teeth on the end of a skate. They don’t feel like anything that we’re ever going to use. They just persist in annoying us. Most of our results are not based on what happens to us but rather our disposition toward the things that happen. It’s easy to get caught up in your circumstances rather than realizing that you are your circumstances. Most of life is neutral until you get involved. Those teeth on the front of the skate weren’t tripping anyone until you tried to move forward. The world isn’t trying to trip you up. It is just unfolding in front of you. Fly or fall!?!? It’s mostly on you. Be willing to laugh at yourself despite your black eye and try to find the right partners in this world to help you soar!

Ride on time!

Pete

Blogpost, self-reliance

Focus Is a Muscle

Pete Huryk

There are so many things that need to be exercised these days. It’s easy to get overwhelmed by it all. So many things are coming at us from a variety of directions. Knowing what’s important and what isn’t can get confusing. Even when the priorities are established, our world is one of distraction. It takes a strong focus muscle to get anything done.

The first step to strengthening any muscle is recognizing that it needs work. Assuming that it’s fine because it’s easier to ignore it makes no sense. Any rationalization is more than likely an excuse. “I’m a good multi-tasker” or “I’m just not good at _____.” may make you feel better in the moment but carry little weight overall. The truth is probably closer to “I’ve not practiced focus, especially on things that are difficult or ‘boring.'” Life is not likely to cater to your preferences any time soon. So it is on you to work out this weakness.

Just like any workout program, it takes consistency and overloading. That doesn’t mean create an environment of distraction. Isolation of the focus muscle is key. Take away all of the distractions possible. Focus on the task at hand, perhaps for only a few moments. If that muscle has atrophied to the point of non-existence, it may feel more like rehab that working out. Regardless, do not judge yourself for where you are. Just focus on the progress that you want to make. It may not come as quickly as you’d like either. One of the reasons that most people are not fit is that they want their muscles to develop quickly and they lose focus. Whether real muscles or the focus muscle, these things develop at their own speed. All you can do is the work!

Focus!

Pete

Blogpost, self-reliance

Being Around Older People

Pete Huryk

When I was a teenager, my grandparents lived with my family in an addition that we built onto the house. Like so many of the experiences that we have in life, it didn’t hit me until much later what a gift I’d been given. Initially they were both there but then my grandmother passed away. It brought mortality directly into the house. After her passing, I started doing a bit more with my Pop Pop. I would go to church with him from time to time on Sundays and breakfast afterward. Not exactly the preferred activity of a teenager but I don’t remember complaining much. It was an exercise in perspective.

Our society is moving at a pace and has a “newness” that seems relatively content with discarding people who can’t keep up. While I understand that the shiny things are exciting, there exists a foundation on which things are built. It’s easy to ignore the building blocks when admiring the heights that we’ve achieved. Unfortunately or fortunately, those blocks are integral to the structure. Whether it is recognized or not, the building topples without them. As it is with our older generation. We did not arrive at Instagram in an instant. It took generations of grandparents looking at family photos with their grandkids before we got the idea of valuing our memories through photography. Now we think that our “stories” are the full story. They’re not. Just a flash in the pan.

History doesn’t repeat itself but it tends to echo. So when you get the chance to talk to someone older than you, don’t rush. The echo of your future may be heard within their past. The telegraph is the telephone. Just like the radio is the television. Human beings are still here experiencing life as an organism intended to live in the wild but existing in relative comfort. Ask the questions that you might need answers to in ten years! An older person may not understand Snapchat but they have seen enough of the world to know what things are worth chatting about decades later. Maybe it’s time to sit and chat.

Ah-sasoo!

Pete

Blogpost, self-reliance

Who saves the hero?

Pete Huryk

In the 1978 movie Superman, Lex Luther’s lackey Miss Teschmacher saves the Man of Steel from certain death as he almost drowns with a kryptonite necklace weighing him down. She sneaks a kiss before releasing him from the kryptonite’s dark power because she knows it’s not going to happen later. A relatively minor character with a soiled past takes an opportunity to save an almost invincible superhero. Certainly it’s a movie but often truth is stranger than fiction.

Most of us are not running around with a cape or a utility belt filled with gadgets. It can get a little uncertain who the real heroes are. With Superman and Miss Teschmacher, the equation is simple overall but in that moment she gets to be the hero. A moment of generosity and caring when it really mattered flipped the script on who she was. That’s the opportunity that we all have.

Each and every day we walk past would be heroes. There are people with greatness lying dormant within them. They are weighed down by their own form of kryptonite. Drowning in tears of the past or fears for the future. Perhaps, you could help to save them. I say help because we are all at least partially responsible for saving ourselves. But with the right word, right action, right support, just maybe, the kryptonite could be lifted from their neck long enough to get their bearings. They may not notice you or thank you but it might just be enough.

Superman is the hero because he consistently does the right thing. Miss Teschmacher has no ability to fly but she has the ability to choose. She could choose from that moment forward to do the right thing. Capeless but no less a hero. Since Halloween is over, your standard clothes will have to suffice as you go out into the world. Movember is upon us. A kind word or a quick check in may be all that it takes to save a hero that could save another!

It’s a bird! No! It’s a plain old person doing what’s right!

Pete

Blogpost, self-reliance

Duality

Pete Huryk

It’s such a difficult thing to balance especially in English! The equilibrium between opposing forces that we need to consider. At least in Spanish, they have the verbs SER and ESTAR which both translate to mean “to be”. However they are used very differently. SER is used for things that are either permanent or consistent, while ESTAR is used for things that are temporary. This may seem like a simple distinction but we run into these dichotomies daily and they trip us up. Focusing on the moment is a crucial component to our success. However, long term planning and attention to the horizon is also prudent. How do we balance?

The recognition of the duality is probably the first step. I’m not so sure that perfect balance is possible. It’s one of the many reasons that I’m such a proponent of soccer as a teaching tool. A team that is committed to the attack is now more susceptible in defense. Risks must be taken in order to get to the goal but throwing all caution to the wind is a poor strategy in most instances. Formations and tactics change with time in order to exploit or counter the status quo. The same is also true within our culture as the pendulum swings in one direction or the other, it tends to swing back.

As an individual, it’s on you to recognize the duality within the world and within yourself. Recognizing that there are very few silver bullets for us to use means that we must be conscious. Conscious to the fact that the world is ever changing and there are so many things that are still true from a thousand years ago that it’s staggering. Our job remains, as I’ve put it before, FCO (Figure Crap Out!). Just remember that the answer of today may not work tomorrow.

Good luck and good planning!

Pete