Category: Uncategorized

Uncategorized

Put On Your Iron Man Pants and Run!

Pete Huryk

This past weekend, the family and I took a trip down to Philadelphia to meet up with my best friend and his family.  It was a great opportunity to catch up and for our kids to spend some time together.  I’m also training for a ten mile race in a few weeks and needed to do a six mile run.  Luckily our hotel was almost exactly three miles from the “Rocky Steps”, one of my favorite running destinations.  It was a perfect scenario for me to enjoy myself and get in work that needed to be done.

The problem arose at 6:30 am on Saturday morning.  I woke up ready to run and realized that I had forgotten my running pants and shorts at home.  I had two choices: go back to bed or wear my Iron Man pajama pants on the six mile run.  I chose the latter.  They were warm enough and have pockets to carry my iPhone.  The only negative was my appearance.

Far too often our appearance to others dictates our behaviors.  I am not saying that appearances do not matter at all.  However there is a calculation that needs to be done to decide when it should matter.  In this situation, my long term goal of the ten mile run was far more important than the short term appearance.  Did I feel foolish?  Not for one second!  I knew what I was doing and why I was doing it.  The opinions of strangers that passed by did not matter because they are judging me on only one metric.  I must judge myself on many others.

Defining ourselves completely by the opinions of others is a losing game.  The odds of pleasing others 100% of the time are so minuscule that is bound to lead to disappointment.  Define yourself in your own terms and decide when the opinions of others matter or not.

IronManPants

Uncategorized

The Ten Minute Snow Shovel

Pete Huryk

This morning on my way to the gym, I was delayed for about two minutes.  Along my route, I was stopped because a person was backing out of their driveway or at least trying to.  This person had decided that the ten minutes that it would take to shovel their driveway was too much time to invest.  So they tried hit the gas and muscle their way through the eight or more inches of snow in their driveway.  I had to stop because although it looked hopeless, if they broke through as I was passing their problem could become my problem.

It’s not an uncommon story.  In fact it is one that I have lived out myself many times.  We become too lazy or indifferent to do things as we know they should be done.  Then we spend longer trying to fix the mess that we’ve made from the short cut.  Are the shortcuts ever really worth it?

 

Uncategorized

Life Is All About T&A

Pete Huryk

At this point, depending on your gender, the title caught your attention for very different reasons.  However if you are reading, then that only serves to back up my point.  Your life and anyone else’s life is dominated by T&A.  Probably not the T&A that you have in mind at the moment but rather Thoughts and Actions.

Our thoughts are the pictures and words inside of our heads that cause emotion.  They are the citizens of our first world.  The world that we create for ourselves.  Some of us are effective architects who take great care in the thoughts that are created in our minds.  Others allow any garbage that is brought in through the senses to penetrate and take root.  Our thoughts are the first half of the equation that creates our life.

The other is our actions.  Those things that we do in the physical world.  Our actions are the reality that we share with others.  Hopefully our actions are based in some part on thought.  Often they are a representation of what we did yesterday and the day before.  Regardless the actions that we take are the life that we lead.

The combination of your T&A are the sum total of who you are as a person.  Are you proud of your T&A?  Do they need some changes?  The only way to change yourself is to change your thoughts, your actions or both.  Spend some time paying attention to your T&A.

Uncategorized

My Black Belt

Pete Huryk

I am a black belt in a particular martial art.  This is not conceit or delusion.  I am the best in the world at this particular discipline.  Within fractions of a second, I am able to leave my opponent as incapacitated as I want.  I strike fear into my opponent enough to paralyze him.  If I wanted, I could leave my opponent lying in a twisted heap on the floor sobbing.  However I use restraint and do not practice this art with the regularity that I used to.

The martial art that I possess a black belt in is “self-deprecation”.  I was better than anyone that I know at tearing me apart.  It was almost second nature.  I knew all of the pressure points, the soft spots and how to land a knockout punch.  Sometimes other people would get involved but for the most part, I gave their punches much more power.  I remember starting out as a white belt.  It seemed like a smart move at the time.  I would say something bad about myself in the presence of a female.  She would refute it and I got a bit of a boost.  A small dip in ego for a bit of a raise in ego.  It was a simple con that I played on myself but eventually, I got too good at the dip and dismissed anyone that tried to pick me up.  As I realized the ridiculousness of my martial art, I started to practice less and less.

My guess is that most people have some degree of mastery at this skill.  We know the buttons to push and weaknesses.  Although it may be an easy art to learn and master, it is not one that should be practiced often.  A tempered conscience is a healthy thing to possess but a self-deprecating mindset only hurts.

 

Uncategorized

The Book and The Movie

Pete Huryk

In most cases when a movie is made from a book, the general consensus is that the book is better.  There are many reasons for this but the main one is that a book uses words that the reader must employ to create pictures in his mind.  Books may be written in black and white but they exist in the world of imagination.  The writer’s words are a map that reader uses to create a world without compromise.  I love this medium because of its limitations being based only on the mind of the reader.

As I have mentioned before, I am also a huge movie guy.  The experience is completely different because it happens in “real” time.  The emotions caused by the combination of director, actors, scenery and etc. are much closer to the surface.  Everyone in the room can have a simultaneous reaction to the sights and sounds on display.  Movies inch closer toward reality because we are visual creatures.

The disappointment of the adapted book comes from expectation and compromise.  The viewer wants to see the pictures from their head come to life on the screen.  Movies have several limitations which cause compromises.  If the viewer goes in with the expectation that the movie will be different, it leads to less disappointment and an appreciation for each in their own right.  In all honesty they are two very different things.

Now the point.

We all have this war of Book vs. Movie going on inside of us.  The book is our thoughts.  The way that we envision that our life will go.  The movie is the reality of how things actually go.  In this situation, the same factors cause most of the upset: expectation and compromise.  Your life will almost never match your mental picture perfectly.  As soon as you add in other actors and their interpretations of the script, the movie is bound to stray.  Finding your own balance of expectation and compromise is the way to be satisfied with the movie version of your mental book

.Shakespeare

Uncategorized

Your Game and Keeping Score

Pete Huryk

As a soccer coach, I will often use games in practice to work on different skills.  A game of keep-away with the number of passes being the objective is a way to work on possession.  The key to success is that everyone understands what the game is and how to keep score.  In your life it is important to understand what games your are playing and are you keeping score in a way that allows for you to win some times.

As you go through your daily life, it is important to first pay attention to the “games” that you are playing.  There are literally millions of “games” that the human race are playing.  You have chosen to engage in some and ignore others.  For example, you might be really invested in the “make my parents proud” game or the “be attractive to the opposite sex” game.  Depending on which game you’ve decided to make important, you’ll act very differently.  I am not going to moralize on which games are more important.  The only thing that I would suggest is that you are aware of the games that you’ve made important and if they’ll help get you  where you want to go.

Now that you are sure of the games you want to play, how do you keep score?  Be sure to line your game up with a score that is appropriate and attainable.  If your game is “helping other people” but you keep score by how much money you make, you might need to reevaluate.  The game and the score are not directly related, so you might be really good at the game but feel like failure.

The other thing to be wary of is making the goal unattainable for you.  If your game is “being fit” but you keep score by a ridiculous set of criteria including: 10% body fat, huge lifting numbers or extremely low running times, you may want to revamp.  Humans thrive on progress.  If your goal and the way to score are the same thing, it decreases your chances for success.  So small benchmarks can make your possibility for success much better.

What game are you playing and how do you keep score?  Answer these two questions. Perhaps you can give yourself a better chance of winning the games that you actually want to play.  Also you might be able to quit some games that you didn’t realize you were playing.

Uncategorized

Who Deserves It?

Pete Huryk

Nothing is infinite regarding human beings and our lives.  Time, money, love, adoration, fame and respect are all commodities that run out at some point.  Since we know that all of these are meant to deplete, why don’t we spend them more wisely?  Shouldn’t we be asking regularly, who deserves it?

The world travels at such a fast pace that many of our daily interactions seem to be reactionary or on some form of auto-pilot.  It may serve us in some ways by helping us to get things done but we need to make sure that important things are not left behind.  Our Facebook timeline, Twitter feed and Snapchats may seem important at the moment.  Perhaps they connect us to the people that we love most because they are far away.  The technology is not inherently evil or disruptive.  We make it that way by our choices.  Do you have a better relationship with your cell phone than your: mother, father, brother, sister, best friend, boyfriend or girlfriend?

We are surrounded by devices that are “connection tools”.  Are we using them to connect or to distract?  Take a moment and use your phone or a piece of paper and a pen.  Write a list of the five most important people in your life.  Within the next five days, contact each one of them in the most human way that you have available to you.

1. Face to face

2.  Facetime, Skype, Google Hangout

3. Phone Call (that thing actually makes calls still!)

It doesn’t have to be the most Earth shattering conversation.  You just need to relay the message however subtly or bluntly that you can, “You’re important to me.”  In a world of unlimited connection, shouldn’t we spend most of our time connecting with those we love rather than with strangers who are “Trending”?  Make these five people trend for a few days and notice how you feel.

Uncategorized

This Is What You Wanted

Pete Huryk

MarathonAs we are moving past the time when most people have given up on their New Year’s Resolutions, I offer this subtle reminder.  THIS IS WHAT YOU WANTED.  It is sometimes a difficult thing to swallow.  Goals and resolutions are pretty and shiny when we create them.  Everything will go great!  You’ll be able to maintain this level of excitement until you get to the end!  The problem is that we usually forget or don’t know the following.

When you set up a goal or make a resolution it is much like ordering your favorite dessert.  For me that would be the classic chocolate milkshake.  Unfortunately you forgot to read the fine print.  Before you will be served your delicious dessert, you have an appetizer of pain coming.  That will be followed by a main course of discipline with self-sacrifice sauce and side order of humility.  Once you are able to choke down those mammoth size helpings of something that YOU DIDN’T ORDER, you’ll finally get that thing that you wanted.

Just remember that THIS IS WHAT YOU WANTED, all of it is part of the deal.  Embrace it.  You’ll actually find at some point  halfway through the main course that you like the taste of it.  Those things that you overlooked on the menu are actually something that you want for yourself.  The problem is that most people retreat too early because THIS IS NOT WHAT I WANTED!  At the end of the meal you’ll have to settle up the check.  If you stuffed yourself full with meal and goal, the bill is paid with PRIDE.  If you left your meal unfinished, then you have a debt of REGRET that is difficult to wipe away.

Decide on what you want from the menu!

Pete

Uncategorized

The Paper Collection

Pete Huryk

DiplomaIn college I was a Spanish major and there was a girl in several of my classes who was a Spanish minor.  She was very attractive but her Spanish skills were lacking.  One day she told me that she didn’t even like speaking Spanish that she was just taking the classes to get the minor.  This prompted my question, “why get the minor?”  “Because it will look good on my resume.”  At this point, I was flabbergasted.  “Isn’t the company that is impressed by that going to expect that you’ll be able to use the language?”  This thought had never occurred to her.

In this world of standardization, classification and certification, the papers that we are able to collect seem to hold too much weight.  The story of my Spanish-challenged classmate is not made up and unfortunately not uncommon.  Our diplomas and grades are collected in the hope that it will bring us to that promised land in the future.  The issue is that when we have all of the papers that someone says we need, will we be able to do anything?

Perhaps, paper is not the thing that we need to collect.  Maybe there are better commodities out there to be sought.  Rather than collecting paper, we should be collecting: thoughts, hearts, minds, influence, respect, trust, love, esteem, help, counsel, ideas, laughter, smiles, jokes, hugs, handshakes, pats on the back, kisses, and the list goes on and on.

I’d rather struggle to get in the door because I lack the paper rather than being pushed out the door because my paper was meaningless.