Tag: best self

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Mayan Activity

Pete Huryk

mayanThe Mayan people are an interesting historical group to study.  Their story is filled with impressive accomplishments and shrouded in mystery because of their sudden decline and disappearance.  They were highly skilled in mathematics and scientific discovery.  Long before Europeans set foot in the “New World” they had a working 365 day calendar and produced thousands of books using a type of paper made from bark.  Some of their cities contained sports arenas, schools, hospitals and libraries.  In terms of fashion, they were far ahead of their time with ear gauges and other adornments that are still practiced today.  As impressive as the Mayan accomplishments are, the thing that seems to make them most interesting is that they disappeared.

The story arc of almost any great person or society has an origin followed by a rise to prominence and an eventual fall or recession.  The Mayan people seemed to be at their peak when they all but disappeared.  There are theories about their decline but no one is completely certain.  It was in thinking about their decline that I began to face Mayan Activity (My Inactivity).

On some level the end of the Maya is most likely the same thing that brings the end of us all.  The things that are left undone.  Failure is very rarely a product of someone who did too much but rather the person or people who did not do enough.  The people who failed to prepare, to learn, to try, to understand or act.  We can stand idly by and blame our downfall on circumstance but the truly great people make circumstances bend to their will.  The rise of the Mayans did not promise them a future that would last forever.  They were only promised that moment and most likely their inactivity lead to their Mayan downfall.

So the question now comes to you.  Are you at your peak and ready for your decline?  Or have you just begun?  Is the height that you’ve reached only a stepping stone to where you will end?  It is not a question of when but a question of will that makes us great.  The story of the Mayans is the story of so many.  Unrealized promise.   Do you want to look back and think what might have been or revel in the glory of what was?

Reverse your inactivity today!

Pete

 

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The Port-o-Potty Clark Kent

Pete Huryk

clarkkentAt one point in history, the transition from Clark Kent into Superman was done in a phone booth.  The changing room for the “man of steel” was a utility of the every man.  People could feel their own association to this man with supernatural powers by simply making a phone call.  Unfortunately times have changed.  The phone booths have disappeared and so have our beliefs in the possibility of greatness for the common man.

In the modern day, the only small changing room available to Superman would be a Port-o-Potty.  As depressing as this may seem, perhaps it is the perfect mental picture for the situation of the day.  Our inclination is no longer to believe in the magnificent or the awe-inspiring.  Instead we assume that everything is a sham, fraud or ripoff.  Our hope has been sullied by too many people that sought to capture our dollars and not our hearts.  A hero of today almost has to rise out of the refuse because we tend to assume that squeaky clean is too good to be true.  Or worse, we cannot believe in our own possibility for greatness because we know where we come from.

Clark Kent, the phone booth or the port-o-potty are all just a prelude to the magnificent.  In our cynical world, it’s easy to poke holes in anything and find what is wrong.  The measure of the hero is not in his lack of faults.  The hero is measured by how consistently he shows up and does what other people cannot or will not.  So do not assume because your story is not perfect that it is not your time to be the hero.  At bare minimum there is at least one person in this world that needs you to show up every day and do whatever you’re able.  That person is you!  You’re the hero that you’ve been waiting for!

Thanks!

Pete

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How Does a Scorpion Scratch Its Belly?

Pete Huryk

scorpionSometimes it’s easy to lose sight of the varied tools that we have at our disposal.  We become “one trick ponies” by choice rather than design.  Losing sight of more subtle talents can happen to anyone who has found success with their preferred tool.  When in possession of a great hammer, seeing everything as a nail comes almost naturally.  The problem lies in the fact that all tools are not constructive and some tools kill better than they build.

The scorpion question is rather absurd.  I doubt very heavily that scorpions are capable of itching.  Even if they were, using their stinger to do it would be both uncomfortable and possibly fatal.  With six legs in the vicinity, the scorpion would have to be pretty self-destructive to choose his stinger as his belly scratcher.  The unfortunate truth is that many of us do this anyway.  The lawyer who cross-examines his wife and children.  The athlete who tries to use his might in order to make right in his world.  The teacher who hopes that special someone will learn how to love them through their example.

We are all scorpions with legs and stingers.  The intelligent scorpion knows there’s a time to use each.  A less intelligent scorpion only uses its stinger because it is his best tool.  When you are scratching an itch, be sure that it does not become deadly because you don’t know how to choose the right tool.

Choose wisely!

Pete

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On Your Feet!

Pete Huryk

ConnorWhen I was a kid, my grandparents were one of the only families that I knew who had HBO.  After we were supposed to be asleep, my brothers and I would hide on the steps and watch whatever movie the adults had on.  This was the 80’s so we got to see some great stuff like Star Wars etc.  One time the movie was the Terminator which terrified me for weeks to come but there was always one scene that struck me from that movie.  For basically the entire movie, Sarah Connor is being hunted by the Terminator and her protector from the future, Kyle Reese, is her savior.  It isn’t until almost the end of the movie, when Reese is barely able to keep himself up that Sarah takes over as his protector.  She yells at the almost lifeless man, “On your feet soldier!” and does her best to support him as he struggles to move forward.  This morning as I was running this scene popped into my head.

It gives a great example of the step that many of us need to take in our lives.  We need to get ourselves up on our feet.  Eventually we must realize that it is our responsibility to save ourselves.  People can help us along the way but relying on someone or something else to carry us forever is unrealistic.  Our parents, friends, teachers and government are not responsible for carrying us through life.  At some point it is our responsibility to take that scary but necessary step of self-reliance.  Deciding to take charge rather than play the victim is not an easy choice.  It is so much easier to lean on and blame others for the lives that we lead.  The problem with the completely dependent life is that it robs us of all of our power.

So my suggestion to you is exactly that, “On your feet!”  Only you can carry yourself through this life.  That’s your job.  Only you can lose those 10 lbs, exercise every morning, start that new business, ask out that special someone or write that screenplay.  Other people can help and support but if you don’t consistently act then it won’t last.  There is always something out there that is trying to kill your dreams.  Only you can keep them alive by staying on your feet and moving forward.

Live today like it’s on purpose.

Pete

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I’m Here For The Pizza

Pete Huryk

RookIt was my freshman year of high school.  I don’t recall why I was in the halls so late that day but there I was.  A friend from soccer saw me and asked me if I would play for the chess team in ten minutes.  One of their players was sick and they needed someone.  It was also the end of their season, so they were having a pizza party afterward.  My father had taught me enough about chess that I knew how the pieces moved and how to win/lose the game.  I agreed to play with the expectation being set that I was not very good.

My opponent didn’t know anything about my prior experience or lack thereof.  He was an intellectual type that gave thought to each of his moves and the meaning behind mine.  The truth was that my moves were haphazard at best and I was almost impatient with how long it took for him to beat me.  I was there for the pizza more than the chess.  In the end I did lose relatively quickly and easily because I put almost nothing into the game.

Over the years I’ve become a better chess player but I’m still nothing to write home about.  The reason why I bring up this memory is that it is representative of how many people go through life.  They are focused on specific things and take little notice of much else.  They give up on things that could be important if they just took time to notice.  Their focus on the least common denominator blinds them to the upper limits of what life has to offer.

This is probably not you.  You’re probably reaching for the heights of what you can be: physically, mentally and emotionally.  We can’t live at our best every single moment but to settle for the minimum offered seems absurd.  I’m not just here for the pizza anymore!

Go get it!  (whatever ‘it’ is for you)

Pete

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Delicious Poison

Pete Huryk

Princess Bride“I’ve spent the past few years building up an immunity to iocane powder!” -The Dread Pirate Roberts/Wesley

It was a strategic maneuver.  Obviously Wesley knew that at some point he would be faced with a situation where drinking poison would save his life.  However since iocane is odorless and tasteless, the experience was not done for enjoyment but rather protection.  If Wesley had been alive in modern or realistic times, he would have had a greater number of choices to kill Vizzini.  It just would have taken years and not moments to kill him using a soft drink, ultraviolet sun-rays, fast-food and stress-laden office job.  If you haven’t understood any of this post yet, stop everything and watch “The Princess Bride” right now!

Now that you’re back or never left, it should be obvious to most that our lives are full of possible poisons.  Some can be instantaneous killers.  Others take years to grab hold and choke the life out of people.  Why are we surrounded by so much poison?  Because we want to be!  We really don’t want the literal or figurative death that they carry but it is usually an unwanted side-effect to some deliciousness.   I use the word delicious to describe some positive feeling sensation associated with a negative action or product.  It does not specifically have to be a food/drink.

The delicious moment trumps the long term poisonous effect.  It is all over our society: food, drink, relationships, entertainment and the list goes on.  I’m sure that it is not impossible but it would definitely be difficult to go “poison free”.  So I would not ask that of anyone.  Since I mainly write this blog to challenge myself, the challenge that I lay before you and I is to give up two delicious poisons this week.  Tuesday (8/25) to Tuesday (9/1).  Leave a comment with your two and be honest with yourself and me if you drop the ball.  It’s not failure, it’s data!  You’ve learned something about yourself.  My two poisons are: Iced Tea and ice cream.  I also promise to leave a comment if I fall short.  People who know me will recognize the difficulty of this.  Can you give up Facebook, unnecessary cellphone use, your anger, that cup of coffee or cigarette?

“Never go up against a Sicilian when death is on the line!  HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!” -Vizzini

Pete

 

 

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Paranoid and the Self-Righteous

Pete Huryk

paranoid“Finished with my woman ’cause she couldn’t help me with my mind.  People think I’m insane ’cause I am frowning all the time.”  Those lines don’t even need the backing of guitars or drums to churn a feeling of very raw emotion in my stomach.  “Paranoid” by Ozzy Osbourne/Black Sabbath was the preferred soundtrack of my pre-high school years.  Despite its melancholy and borderline hopeless lyrics, it always seemed to be able to put me into a frenzy that required action of some kind.  My music selection at the time came as a surprise to many especially my middle school French teacher, Madame Gowie.

Although I’m not quite sure where my ability for languages came from, I was able to display talent even in middle school.  Nothing says “cool” in middle school better than being good in French class!  Unfortunately I was slightly unaware of what it took to be cool and became one of Madame Gowie’s favorites with the French name of “Pierre Paul” to boot.  The first time when I truly disappointed the good Madame was when I brought in a picture of someone famous for description.  My magazine picture of Ozzy Osbourne left her in a state of disgust.  Her thoughts about Mr. John Michael Osbourne were not positive in the slightest and it possibly changed her thoughts about me.  For my own part, I had a much stronger positive feeling toward Mr. Osbourne and the effect he had on my life.  So I took up the more normal disposition and disliked French class with my peers.

It was almost too easy for Madame Gowie and others to dislike Ozzy Osbourne.  He sang loud music that they disliked.  His song “Suicide Solution” had been under scrutiny in a court case where a family alleged that the song caused their son’s suicide.  He bit the heads off of bats and doves, what was there to like?

I’m not trying to portray Ozzy Osbourne as my hero by any stretch of the imagination.  My point is that for many people, his “evil” became a way for them to feel more righteous.  It is all too common of a practice today that we mask our own weakness and shortcoming by focusing on those who are worse than us.  If we are fat, we find the obese or our heavier past to feel good.  Do not look to the evil of others to find your righteousness.  You should be able to have a sense of pride in who you are and what you do without the disclaimer of comparing yourself to another.  It is a shell game that you can’t ever win.  “I can’t see the things that lead to happiness, I must be blind.”  There should be a level of autonomy to who you are and how you feel about yourself.  By comparing yourself to others too often, you are either inflating or deflating that which is unique and special about you.

“I tell you to enjoy life….” forget the rest.

Pete

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The Next Layer of Skin

Pete Huryk

LifesaversStay with me on this one!  To a certain extent, I wish that each layer of my skin were a different color like a stack of Lifesavers in a rainbow progression.  Each layer would disappear over a set amount of time revealing the next color in the order.  Within a week or so, I would be red, orange, yellow, green, blue etc.  Beside the obvious reduction in racism, I think it would help get past a problem that I think many of us have.  We cannot see past ourselves.

We see ourselves as consistent beings and therefore we act and think consistently with that picture.  The truth is that we are always changing but those changes are so subtle that we do not perceive them.  So when we truly do need to change, we think that it will be difficult or that we are incapable of change.  At some point we need to recognize that we can be more than what we perceive that we are.

We need to be able to see the greatness that is on the horizon.  Our progress or lack of it is a decision.  Do we allow ourselves to see the person who is six layers of skin away?  Or do we accept the “Who I have been is who I will be.”  So the challenge is down to you.

Can you see the greatness inside of your own skin?  Are you willing to do the things necessary to dig for that person that hides underneath?  Or is your skin an imperceptible covering that gets washed down the drain of your shower along with your hopes and dreams?  If only we were multicolored and could say, “by the time I turn green I’m going to ______________!”  We are always shedding skin, so figure out what your ideal skin looks like and put it on underneath.

See the best you inside today.

Pete

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The Fist

Pete Huryk

IMG_0671At one point in my coaching career a group of my players referred to me as “the fist”.  The reason for this nickname was a team talk that I gave.  It highlights the fact that in combat ten separated fingers can do minimal damage.  However combine the fingers into a fist and you can do some real damage.  Today I want to expand upon that idea but generalize it to life rather than athletics.

As I think about the fist of life, I would equate it to an inner circle of people who play particular roles.  Each role is distinct and important toward the inner balance of a person.  The organization of an effective fist may take a good amount of time and introspection.  However the positives to be drawn from the fist are immeasurable.

The thumb – This is the person that is your counterbalance.  They are strong in ways that you are weak.  They may seem different and may not exactly fit in with the rest of your fist.  However they are an anchor that allows you to grasp things and hold on.  My wife is my thumb.  She makes me better because of our differences.  Without her I feel off balance.  The thumb may be the most difficult for a young person to find because that person may be an non-obvious ally.

The pointer finger – This is the person in your circle that is where you want to be in many areas.  They act as a role model or mentor in some ways.  Sometimes it is difficult to get a personal relationship with the people that you want to be.  So modern technology is a great asset.  Use podcasts, blogs, books, videos or whatever other means you can find to get into the mind of someone that you respect.  Depending on your specific goals, this person may be intelligent, wealthy, athletic or inspiring.  If you are relying on resources rather than live people, it may be worthwhile to diversify your pointer fingers.  I’ve had many over the years for different reasons: Tim Ferriss, Gary Vaynerchuk, Tony Robbins, Napoleon Hill, Teddy Roosevelt and Jack Canfield.  I try to avoid “hero worship”.  As you get a deeper picture into a persons life, you realize that we all have flaws.  So picking up the musical talent secrets of a figure like Kurt Cobain might be great.  Following him in other ways is less productive.  Take the good that fits within your model of the world and run with it.

The middle finger – This is the person who believes in your abilities with such confidence that they are willing to say “F___ YOU!” to anyone that doubts you.  I would prefer that this person be you but I realize that you might not be there yet.  The key to the middle finger is that it is your strength.  It stands above the rest in a prominent position.  It doesn’t need to flip off the world all of the time, just when it’s warranted.  Another reason why I’d like for your middle finger to be you is that it stands at the center of the fist.  You should be at the center of your world and all fist movement should be directed by you.  I wasn’t always my middle finger but I am now.

The ring finger – This is your support person.  This person is most like you in the world.  There is little chance that in any situation they won’t understand your point of view.  They are the person that you lean on in bad times.  Perhaps you can sit and watch TV with them just because their presence is comforting.  A good ring finger is worth its weight in gold because you don’t ever have to try.  My ring finger is my brother, Dave.  I never have to consider for a moment where we stand.

The pinkie – This is your comic relief.  The person who can always make you laugh.  Regardless of the situation, they are able to give you a chuckle when you most need it.  Often this person is a stark contrast to the rest of your fist.  No matter how different they may be, they are extremely important to the fist and your balance.  I’m extremely lucky because I met my pinkie in college.  My friend, Schaef, is the guy that I call when I need to laugh.  Even at myself.  We repeat the same jokes and it doesn’t matter.

Even though I’ve got my fist set at the moment, it is able to change and should at times.  For example, I am looking very deeply into finding a live “pointer finger”.  I think that interaction would be great for me to go to the next level.  So go find your fist or at least identify them and realize their importance.

Go get stuff done.

Pete

 

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The Spectator’s Chance

Pete Huryk

There is a common dream that people have where they are a spectator at a sporting event or musical performance.  Suddenly something happens and it becomes necessary for them to become part of the game or performance.  Inevitably in this dream state, the dreamer is successful in this unlikely circumstance and then they wake up.

Personally I’ve had different versions of this dream in the past.  The only part that I dislike is the waking up.  It’s obviously a spectacular fantasy with no basis in reality.  Especially at my age, I’ll never make it as a professional soccer player and I don’t even play an instrument.  The allure comes from the sudden and unexpected success.  To go from zero to hero in the blink of an eyes is the dream of many.

The question that I have for myself today is “what if the waking up is the best part?”  Maybe by waking up after that glimpse of impossible hope we could take a step forward in the real world.  I’m never going to make it as a pro soccer player, this is true.  However there are many other dreams that my inner spectator can move toward right now.  But it’s not going to be a zero to hero moment.  Very few things in life ever are and why should that be the goal to begin with?  Most lottery winners end up bankrupt because they can’t handle the transition.

The spectator’s chance is in the waking up!  Realizing that it won’t happen in a moment.  And DOING IT ANYWAY!