It’s one of those places in time I can return to with absolute clarity. I was sitting on an airplane flying back from Europe in the summer of 1998. My best friend and I had spent almost a month roaming through England, Spain, Germany, and France, with the World Cup as our backdrop. We went to five matches. Traveled hundreds of miles by train and metro. Had my friend’s passport stolen. Filed a police report in Spanish. Befriended two Australian backpackers. Got nudged by one riot cop. And, for the first time in my life, popped a soccer ball. We were exhausted, sunburned, and broke—but happy to be heading home. Mostly.
Somewhere over the Atlantic, with my CD Walkman resting on my knee, I listened to “How’s It Going to Be?” by Third Eye Blind. The song framed what I already knew was coming: the beginning of the end of a years-long, on-again-off-again relationship. During that month in Europe we’d managed to speak only once, and our pattern was familiar—every six months, a breakup, followed by the realization that life felt better together than apart. But on that plane ride, something in me knew this time was different. And when I got home, I was right. No reunion. Just an ending. And the long quiet question of how things would be moving forward.
At that point in my life, I had no idea who Peterborough United were. In one pub, a fellow patron ranted to my friend and me for twenty minutes about the villainy of Millwall, but beyond that my knowledge of lower-league football was almost nonexistent.
Fast forward nearly three decades and a lot has changed, but I find myself processing another separation from an on-again-off-again figure in my life. Darren Ferguson is gone again, and this time—strictly in the managerial sense—I believe it’s the last time. As much as I wanted him to stay, it feels like, for one reason or another, it had to happen. Just as it did with that old relationship, something in the way things worked together simply stopped working.
As I’ve written before, Ferguson was more than the manager. His brand of football set the tone for who Peterborough United have become in the modern era: forward-thinking, fearless, often outscoring everyone in sight. Darragh in the owner’s box and Darren on the touchline became the intermittent winning formula. A rhythm. A cycle. Something dependable even when it wasn’t permanent.
Now that it’s over, I’m left with reverence—and sadness—because of how it ended. My gut tells me Darren will manage again and lift another club to promotion. If that happens, I’ll find myself wondering whether things could have gone differently here. It’s possible that the only road to success—for both the POSH and for Ferguson—was a diverging one.
For now, all I can do is hope that Luke Williams can pull off what no one at Manchester United has managed yet: replacing a club legend.
In soccer, the best players don’t control every moment. They create space. They anticipate. They make the people around them better. The playmaker isn’t the loudest or always the flashiest, he’s the one who sees the whole field and moves the game forward with intention. That’s what great dads do. They watch, they guide, and when the moment is right, they can change everything.
For a while now, though, a lot of dads have been stuck on the sideline. Watching, waiting, wondering how to re-enter the game. The world has shifted under their feet. The old playbook doesn’t quite fit anymore. In the wake of cultural reckonings; from #MeToo to questions about toxic masculinity. Many men have gone quiet. Some out of guilt, others out of confusion. What does it mean to lead without dominating? To protect without controlling? To care without losing yourself?
It’s not an easy set of questions. But maybe that’s the point. This generation of dads has a chance to model a new kind of strength: one that trades authority for empathy, volume for vision, and reaction for responsibility. The game hasn’t changed as much as the way we need to play it.
Fatherhood has always been part construction site, part classroom. We build, we teach, we fix. Sometimes we do it well, sometimes clumsily. The past few years have reminded us that brute force and certainty aren’t the same as wisdom. A lot of men have been told to sit down, listen, and reassess. Honestly, in some cases that was necessary. But now it’s time to take what was learned on the bench and put it into play.
Because the world doesn’t need quieter men. It needs better communicators. Not withdrawn spectators, but intentional playmakers. Men who understand when to press, when to pass, and when to let someone else take the shot.
Soccer dads know that feeling all too well. The helplessness of watching from the sidelines as their kid struggles through a tough game. The urge to fix everything is powerful. But the real lesson isn’t about control; it’s about trust. About giving space to grow while staying close enough to catch them if they fall. That balance between patience and presence might just be what our culture is missing most.
We don’t need men who dominate. We need men who direct. Men who don’t mistake power for purpose or silence for humility. We need dads who understand that their example off the field matters far more than their commentary from the sideline.
So yes, maybe Soccer Dads can help redirect the world, not through lectures or louder voices, but through consistent, grounded leadership. Through showing up. Through making the right pass at the right time.
Because the truth is, the world doesn’t just need to be saved, it needs to be played well. And it’s time for the dads to get back in the game.
Today I received some sad news: a former player passed away. It’s always tough to hear when these things happen. As a coach and teacher, my hope has always been to help propel young people toward better lives. It hurts deeply when one of those lives is cut short.
This young man was what we often call a “utility player.” He wasn’t a regular starter. Most of the time he filled in at center back, but he was athletic enough to step into almost any position and hold his own. Soccer wasn’t even his first sport, yet he embraced his role and carried it with pride. He was the teammate every coach needs: willing, reliable, and unselfish.
His passing has me reflecting on the idea of utility. Not just in sports, but in life, especially for young men today. In many ways, being useful runs deep in the male identity. Yet in our current culture, it sometimes feels like that desire to be of service gets overlooked, or worse, dismissed. Between the labels of “toxic masculinity” and caricatures of outdated strength, many men are left wondering where they fit. Sweeping generalizations about half the population rarely capture the truth and often cause harm. I know plenty of men who simply want to contribute: to their families, their friends, the women in their lives, and society as a whole.
That’s why this loss hits hard. The “utility man” embodies something essential. For generations, men have stepped into roles of protection, labor, and sacrifice. Often trading their own well-being for the good of others. While the world has changed and those old trades may not be demanded in the same way, the core desire to be useful has not disappeared.
Men are useful. And most of them want to be useful (of utility). The utility man isn’t just a placeholder; he’s the glue that holds a team or a community, together. My hope is that more men are seen for the value they bring before they’re gone.
Today, I’ll remember not just the utility man on the pitch, but as a reminder of the dignity and worth in being willing to step in wherever needed. We will miss him.
The season has not gone to plan. Results define clubs, managers, and players, and right now the results simply haven’t been good enough. Huddersfield come to town this Saturday, one of the so-called “big clubs” in League One. POSH have already fallen to Cardiff and Luton—teams tipped to be near the top of the table—and the margin for error is shrinking. But beyond the fixture list and all the hoopla about who’s a heavyweight this season, Peterborough have three opponents more dangerous than any other side they’ll face.
The first opponent: TIME
Time is undefeated. Once you fall behind it, there’s no catching up. Fixtures pile up, injuries take longer to heal, and before you know it the table has moved on without you. The best you can do is stay even with it—by using it wisely, refusing to waste it, and squeezing every ounce from the moments you have. POSH don’t need to panic, but they can’t afford to drift either.
The second opponent: BELIEF
Lately, belief has been in short supply. A couple of late concessions, a missed chance here, a poor call there, and suddenly doubt creeps in. Unlike time, belief can be rebuilt—but it requires intent. A big goal, a clean sheet, even a gritty draw can flip the script. The new signings may provide a spark, but belief has to run deeper than fresh faces. It has to settle into the squad and spread through the stands until both players and fans expect results rather than hope for them.
The final opponent: FOCUS
Focus should be the easiest win, but it’s the one most under attack. Missed referee calls, restless supporters, the lure of bigger contracts elsewhere, the endless chatter online—it’s all noise. Lose focus for five minutes and a match slips away. Win the moments, though, and the matches will take care of themselves. Success will come not from chasing the grand statement but from doing the smallest things well, over and over, until they add up.
As the season wears on, I still believe Darren Ferguson is the right man to guide this side. He’s faced these invisible opponents before and knows how to rally a squad when belief wavers. His track record at POSH—multiple promotions, a knack for rebuilding squads on the fly—proves he understands the climb. With time managed wisely, belief restored, and focus sharpened, I think it’s only a matter of time before things come good.
Before anyone gets their knickers in a twist: no, the Fed isn’t running soccer matches. This is a metaphor. But it’s a helpful one if you’re trying to understand what’s really happening with your money.
Let’s start with soccer balls.
My personal favorites are Wilsons. (I haven’t been paid to say that—yet. Wilson, I’m listening.) They’re durable, reliable, hold air like champs, and play true. But if you swear by Adidas, Puma, Select, or some other brand, great—this still works.
Now imagine a soccer ball hierarchy. Your go-to favorite is at the top. At the bottom? A ball made out of rolled-up newspaper tied with twine. Technically still a ball…. you can kick it… but it’s barely worth the effort.
⚽️ The Game Changes
You’re mid-match, giving it your all. Suddenly, the ball changes.
It looks similar, but the feel is off. A few minutes later, it changes again. Even worse.
You finally realize: the referee and linesmen are doing the switching. When you ask why, they say it’s to “stimulate play.”
But you also notice the good balls being carried off to another game. One you’re not invited to join.
Now your passes go astray. Your shots come up short. Same effort, worse results. Frustrating? Absolutely.
💸 Enter: The Fed
This metaphor isn’t perfect, but it’s close enough.
The dollars in your pocket, bank account, or Venmo aren’t being physically swapped—but their value is being downgraded, constantly.
Compared to just a few years ago, your money buys less. That’s inflation.
And the biggest driver? The Fed puts more dollars into circulation. More supply = each dollar is worth less.
Meanwhile, those with more money? They’re not sitting on cash! They’re putting it into assets: Homes. Stocks. Businesses. Collectibles. Land. Things that tend to rise in price when inflation kicks in.
🏠 Example: The House That Didn’t Really Grow
Let’s say you bought a house in 1980 for $50,000. In 2025, that house might be worth around $340,000.
Did it become 7x more valuable? Not really. It’s mostly that the dollar became weaker. That price rise is inflation, not improvement.
That’s the bait and switch: the average person holds cash, while the wealthy hold assets. Cash erodes. Assets float.
So while you’re left with a downgraded soccer ball, someone else is playing a premium match with premium gear on a field you can’t get to.
🧠 So What Can You Do?
This post won’t solve everything. I’m not pretending to fix the entire financial system.
But if you’re going to play the game, you need to know the rules.
Now that you’re aware of the quiet switch happening beneath your feet, you can start thinking differently:
Learn how money really works.
Pay attention to value, not just price.
Think in assets, not just cash.
Same effort. Smarter game.
Now’s the time to upgrade your knowledge, decisions and life!
There is more than enough talent in the squad to avoid relegation and even go on an extended win streak. The problem isn’t a lack of ability but rather a mentality that has plagued the team. I’m sure this opinion won’t be popular with some of the POSH faithful, but it’s far easier to judge a player as “not good enough” after a poor performance than to examine the deeper issues at play. While some of the gambles POSH has taken over the years haven’t panned out, there are far too many examples of players who have experienced ups and downs with POSH only to thrive at higher levels (Sammie Szmodics, among others).
Rather than taking the negative route that erodes players’ confidence, or the overly positive one that ignores the reality of the situation, there is another approach: neutral thinking.
I’ve read Trevor Moawad’s book a few times, but more often, I share his interview on neutral thinking. It encapsulates so many valuable ideas and stories, particularly about focusing on actionable steps in the present moment rather than dwelling on circumstances or outcomes. Optimists and pessimists can argue all day about whether the glass is half full or half empty, but ultimately, it’s what you do with the water or space in the glass that matters.
Even when circumstances are less than desirable, it’s the actions we take now that determine our outcomes. Losing hurts, and a string of poor performances hurts even more. After the Wrexham match (CJ’s first with the team), it seemed as though the squad had been injected with optimism. How is it that one person could “infect” a team with a positive mindset? Through their actions. As Trevor Moawad explains, removing externalized negativity allows people to reach a neutral state. From there, new thoughts and behaviors can emerge, moving individuals, teams, and even entire communities forward.
Ultimately, it’s the players who need to reach neutral and move forward. The Leyton Orient match might have been more “neutral” than people would have wanted but it got a clean sheet. These are young players who may not yet have the skills to combat the negativity in their environment. It’s part of their development. Fans want results—no doubt about that. But the players are the vehicle for those results. Slashing the tires, pouring sugar in the gas tank, or breaking the windshield is no way to get high performance out of that vehicle.
Neutral thinking offers a path forward: focus on the present, remove unnecessary negativity, and take actionable steps to improve. It’s not about ignoring the reality of challenges or sugar-coating situations. It’s about embracing a mindset that enables growth and resilience, both for the players and the team as a whole.
It was slurred and almost incoherent but that was the message that a teammate relayed to me during my freshman year soccer season. I’m not exactly sure what the message was intended to do. Was I supposed to change my ways and start drinking at that moment? Was I supposed to be hurt by the lack of respect that I was getting from him? I’m not sure but the message was emphatic and clear (well, minus the slurring.)
There are bound to be people out there who have a completely different worldview to you. Their up is your down and your right is their wrong. The easiest thing in the world is to dismiss their thoughts. Or even worse, dismiss them completely. It takes absolutely no effort. Curiosity about how they came to their conclusions takes effort. A conversation about it would be uncomfortable. And acknowledging any validity to their stance might undermine your self-image. It’s just easier to dismiss or even hate.
It’s easier but it probably doesn’t make anything better. We need people on this team. The entire system works better if we’re all heading in a similar direction. And the dynamic tension between opposing ideas often helps us get to a better solution. Beer drinkers and non-beer drinkers can coexist to find a better way forward. Actually, it’s the only way forward.
An article from the Telegraph before the annoying pop up ads.
It took a little while to find the time to write up a post about my trip to England but here it is! The POSH Pilgrimage 2024 was a much longer and more involved trip but it created some great memories for my son and I before he left for college! Our love of football (soccer) has been one of the biggest parts of our relationship. We did as many things football as we could throughout our time there. Since his birth, I’ve been trying to convert him into a POSH fan. This trip was at least another partial attempt but I’m not sure if it worked.
The timetable of the trip was set for months due to our flights but the fixture list held us hostage for a while. Huddersfield at home was a great draw from a location perspective although the competition was going to be difficult. We arrived in Peterborough the day before the match. The city has changed a lot since my last visit. My affection for the club bleeds over into the city. So it’s interesting to return after a few years and see what growth has happened.
POSH vs Huddersfield– On match day, I got the opportunity to meet former Yellow Block personality Matthew Kisby. We met for a pint at Charters with my son and I drinking our first beer in England together. The prematch gathering was much better this time around. Last trip we went to Ebenezer’s which was a really cool place but a bit off the beaten path. London Road is still London Road regardless of what name gets slapped onto the outside. With this being my third trip, I know what it is and what it is not. The LRE keeps the noise of the fans in and it’s not the best ground in the country. However, it is the home the team that I support. So, I love it regardless!
The match was about what I could have expected. On my first trip, I saw the POSH dismantle MK Dons. Last trip we tied Sunderland on a last gasp goal. I was destined to see a loss at some point and I got it this go around. There was just that cutting edge missing to the attack but I knew that coming into the match. This season was going to be a project and I saw the beginning stages. Not disheartened in the slightest.
On Sunday, I got the opportunity to go to the training facility to watch the U18s and U16s play. It was great to see young players trying to apply the same principles as the first team. Just going to the facility was enjoyable for me because I remember the stories of players changing in their cars when they practiced at a park. The club has come a long way in the last twenty years. Despite my desire to stay and just watch as many training sessions and youth games as I could, the trip was about us seeing as much football as possible.
Sheffield Wednesday vs Plymouth– I know… I know… Sheffield Wednesday… I’m supposed to hate them due to the loss but I needed to be practical. It was the only match that worked for our schedule. I’d never been to Sheffield before despite being a fan of Def Leppard.
The time crunch between our train, to the hotel, to the match was an obstacle but we made it. The walk from the hotel to the match among Wednesday and Plymouth fan was enjoyable. Little bits of banter back and forth but nothing of concern. The ground itself was a definitive step up from London Road. Obviously, the history, fanbases, and financial backing are very different. So, it’s not a slight just a reality. The match itself was enjoyable for a neutral. Wednesday was dominant and it made for a really good atmosphere.
POSH vs Oxford United – The next stop on the pilgrimage was in Oxford. Great city to explore! The university and the other sites in the area made the visit worth it even before the match. I wish that we’d had more time to spend there but since it was a total unknown prior to our visit, I only had us there for the day before and match day.
I feel sorry for the fans of Oxford as their stadium stinks. Literally! The facility itself was fine but the odor was pretty overwhelming. This match played out much like the first. The faint continuous cheer from the POSH fans who traveled summed up the match well. Not everyone seemed ready to sign from the same song sheet. Hayes looked extremely lively but POSH couldn’t find the net and handed the result over to Oxford through mistakes. Winning my son over as a POSH fan was not working out well. Two defeats in two matches was less than ideal. It was time to move on to London for a couple days of football sightseeing.
Chaos in the Capital – The trip from Oxford to London was one of many where a train cancelation had us standing in the hall near the toilet for the trip. Arriving in London, we took the Underground and a bit of a walk to our hotel. It was one of those places tucked into a neighborhood. Upon our arrival, there was a note on the door stating that the hotel was closed down temporarily. This was a huge surprise but I sprang into problem solving mode quickly. I found a room at the Chelsea Cloisters building. It was reasonably priced and didn’t look like a bad option online. BUYER BEWARE!!! Upon our arrival at our room, I knew it wasn’t going to work and tried to either change rooms or get a refund on the room that I had been in for 5 minutes. The letting office were very nice but had no options or refund available for me.
So Luke and I went on a walk to get out of the funk that the situation had put us in. We visited Stamford Bridge’s store to pick something up for a friend who is a fan. While walking around the ground, I decided to look up the price for the hotel attached to Stamford Bridge, The Millenium and Copthorne Hotel. IT WAS ALMOST THE SAME PRICE AS THE VERY DISAPPOINTING CHELSEA CLOISTERS!!! On my phone, I made a reservation and despite paying for a hotel that I never stayed in, I was extremely happy with how things turned out. I’m not a Chelsea fan. I don’t dislike them at a Man City level but I am happy to sing the praises of their hotel. It was the best place that we stayed at our entire trip!
Since there were no matches in the later part of the week, we did stadium tours. Our tour of Hotspur Stadium was eaten up by our hotel fiasco. Now that we were housed at Stamford Bridge, doing a stadium tour only made sense. We also ventured to Craven Cottage which was my favorite stadium that we visited. From its location on the river to the historic aspects of the ground, it just has a character all its own. The construction of the new hotel makes the place a work in progress but I’m hopeful that I’ll get the chance to visit when it is all done.
This photo is taken from our seats. AMAZING!
Everton vs Brighton – For Luke, the main attraction for the trip was going to the Everton match. Acquiring tickets was a bit more difficult this time around. For our last trip, I had bought tickets through the Everton USA supporters group. Unfortunately the club changed that process and the group was no longer able to purchase tickets for American fans. Luckily, a supporter who is a season ticket holder saw my post about my trip and offered to sell me his two seats for the Brighton match. It was probably the most stressful part of the trip for me because up until we were in Oxford, I wasn’t sure if they were going to come through. Not only were the tickets transferred, they were amazing seats! I won’t list his name here but I am so thankful that he made this part of the trip a joy for Luke. He was literally “over the moon” with where we were sitting. The performance by Everton…. left a decent amount to be desired but since we had seen them thrash ManU on the first trip, he took it in stride. Of course, the POSH won in Shrewsbury! Although I would have liked to have seen it, being with Luke for his last match in Goodison was worth it.
London to go home – Due to our great experience earlier in the week, I booked our last night in London at the hotel at Stamford Bridge. There was a match on that day which added a bit of atmosphere to the place. Luke begrudgingly went with me to the area of Richmond where Ted Lasso was filmed. Despite the several complaints that we were being “such tourists”, he took some photos of me in the area. I was mildly surprised how much of the area was used in the show. Even though it was a complete tourist trap, I still loved going there.
After another great trip (not in terms of results), the one thing that probably has stuck with me the most is what Luke said after the Brighton loss. He said that he “needed” a loss like that to really solidify his fandom. It’s easy to be a fan when everything is going your way. The more difficult thing is to stick around when everything isn’t.
“In time or so I’m told, I’m just another soul for sale! Oh well!” -Foo Fighters
The January transfer window just ended. Some clubs will feel like they “had a successful” window, while others will feel like they lost out. For the club I support, I just want the window to recede into the distance as quickly as possible. While I’m making this observation from a really far distance, my view is that the window unsettled a few of our consistent performers.
For a little while in January, players are valued (very publicly) at certain levels by both the club who owns their contract and ones that are interested. Despite my vivid imagination, I cannot get an accurate picture inside of my head how it must feel to have millions of dollars/pound/euros/etc. associated with your name. There is a great scene from the movie Bull Durham where Crash Davis professes that Nuke’s arm is “worth a million bucks a year! All my limbs put together aren’t worth 7 cents a pound.” It’s got to be hard on both sides. The million dollar men must feel a certain amount of pressure to live up to that price tag. While on the other side of the coin, only having lower offers or no offers come in must be difficult on the psyche of young players especially. A month ago, several players within the club could not put a foot wrong. They were firing on all cylinders. For the past few weeks, there have been signs of men caught in too many minds. My hope is that this fades as February moves forward.
While very few of us are professional athletes with transfer fees associated to our names, it’s still easy to get caught up in our value. Whether it’s the amount we earn per annum or the connection with loved ones, there is a temptation to want to know or feel our value. Many of us look for reassurance that we’re “doing a good job” and are wanted. While it’s a normal thing for people to want, it’s completely out of our control. The value that comes from the outside world is not truly up to us. We do not get to decide the value that others put upon us. All we can do is BE VALUABLE!
It’s semantics yes but it’s also the only thing that can be done. Doing the things that are important to the team, your family, the company, etc. is all that you can do. Whether you have an agent or not, your job is to be valuable (or take it away from the financial, be useful). The transfer window is closed. So now is the time to get people to notice you. Do the things that truly matter. Be the one that they can’t live without because you add so much. No one is ever going to put an accurate price tag on your head, so don’t let it affect how you play your game. Even if you’re not an athlete!
Unfortunately! I wasn’t able to make the trip to Anaheim for the Convention this year. However, I figured I’d put down a few thoughts that may bring benefits into view of anyone who is at the Convention.
Sessions – Over the years the types of sessions that I’ve focused on have changed. When I first started attending the Convention, I went to as many field sessions as possible. Eventually, I started attending more psychology based discussions. Bill Beswick was always standing room only but then I really got into the work of Dan Abrahams (check out his podcast and follow him on socials). As my coaching turned into more administrative duties as well, I started attending finance sessions. My co-author and I hope to present in Chicago next year to talk about our book that uses soccer to explain finances to people. Regardless of your changing interests or role, there is always something to check out.
Friends/Colleagues – For years, I traveled to the Convention with one of my colleagues and best friends. There is nothing better than getting a long weekend immersed in your greatest passion with one of your best friends. In addition to that, there are friends that I basically only see at the Convention each year. It’s great to catch up with all of these people from my past and meet new people.
The Energy – I know this is an amorphous one but I always walk away from the Convention energized. Whether I got a new drill, networked with a possible collaborator or just sat in all of that soccer with a problem in my program; I love coming away from the Convention feeling like I got a shot of adrenaline.
Proximity – Despite the size of the US, the soccer world within it is not extremely big. Yes, millions of people play the game and it’s widespread. However, at the Convention, a lot of the big players (figuratively speaking) are there. I’ve met a variety of former heroes including Ricky Davis (who is the reason I started playing). David Copeland-Smith (Beast Mode Soccer), who has trained many of the USWNT over the years, was part of our social crew one year. There’s no real reason to get star struck. They’re at the same place for basically the same reason, a love of the game.
The Women – Whoa! Don’t get the wrong idea! I’m a single guy in my 40s but that’s not what I’m talking about. When I first attended the Convention decades ago, it was not exclusively men attending but it was pretty close. Over the past few years, the number of women attending the Convention seems to have increased exponentially. As a father of a teenage girl (who hates soccer damnit!), I love the idea of our female soccer players getting influenced and inspired by women coaches who are dedicated to their craft. The women’s game has so many positives at the moment. I hope that the trend continues this year with female attendance.
Exploring (an extra one) – Anaheim would have been a new city for me. Regardless of the weather, my tradition when I travel is to go for a run every morning through the city. For me, it’s the best way to get to know the area. At the Convention specifically, I enjoy walking through the Exhibit hall without a purpose. Most of the stuff that is there, I’ve seen before. However, as technology gets better and cheaper, it’s great to see what can be done to help soccer players at any level get better.
So if you’re at the Convention, enjoy it! There are so many reasons to be there. Hopefully you’re surrounded by people you know taking in the energy and content.
Huryk Unlimited 