Month: September 2023

Blogpost, self-reliance

That Shoe Has Sailed!

Pete Huryk

Two letters difference and a new idea is born! Why is the shoe sailing? What happened to the ship that we were expecting? Can shoes really sail? All of these questions and more spring out of a small misstep. Just a 12% change and the idea is turned completely on its head.

The reaction to this type of upheaval depends completely on your disposition. For some people, the introduction of the new and unexpected is cause for alarm. Those shoes and their sailing are a threat on every possible level. The status quo was intended to be kept and they’ll not abide those sailing shoes! While other people are open to the new and unique, the shoes bring possibility to a mundane concept. Those shoes are trailblazing and its about time.

Both ideas have validity and their own fan groups. It’s worth the introspection to figure out whether or not you’re a shoe sailor or not. That simple knowledge can give you insight into setting up your life. Squeezing all of the juice that you can out of the known is not a bad way to live, if that’s who you are. If you’re infatuated with the new, you probably shouldn’t wallpaper your house because it’s difficult to remove. And maybe you should rent anyway! Knowing thyself is an old idea that rings true even today. So look in that mirror because the shoe hasn’t sailed on you yet!

Hoist the sails!

Pete

Blogpost, self-reliance

An Open Door Policy

Pete Huryk

One thing that can be easy to forget about an open door policy is that there is still a door. There are so many times that willingness to listen gets misconstrued as agreement. Information is a valuable currency and an open door policy invites it in. However, it is not a “no door policy.” The possibility still exists to close up shop at certain points to avoid negative outcomes.

We are a social species and we need each other in so many ways. However, doors exist because not everyone deserves to get inside or sometimes needs to be removed. Open door is just a predisposition, not a permanent state. Boundaries are healthy things to have. Being inviting and accepting can be counterbalanced by being discerning and observant.

For sure, let the door be open but don’t be afraid to close it when necessary. Access to you and your time should not be frivolously given because then they are not respected. You open the door because you care about others. You close it because you also need to care for yourself.

Shut the front door!

Pete

Blogpost, self-reliance

Ten Boots (Personal Value)

Pete Huryk

It’s hard to say how many people remember the band Dangerous Toys. Not exactly a one hit wonder because they had two songs that I remember as “hits” but they weren’t mega stars. One of the songs from their self-titled album was called “Ten Boots” that is an ode to the group’s cowboy boots. A mix of 80s rock and sentimentality over footwear, it’s not showing up on many people’s Spotify playlist these days. That I can assure you! However, it is a great example of personal value.

If you were born after 1990, this is the insert from a cassette. Prior to Spotify, Apple Music and even CDs this was a commonly found item!

There are so many things in this world that we hold sacred. That same item is something that another person would set on fire (like white cowboy boots). It’s not the value that the world puts on it that matters. Value is determined by the individual for a whole host of reasons. Unfortunately, in this interconnected world, we tend to look outward to find the value of something. Worth is based on what other people think…. F%#$ that! Put your own price tag or value onto that thing that you cherish. It doesn’t always need to be an interconnected world in which you live. Sometimes, you need to be willing to be on an island.

How much you value something is up to you. And more than anything, you need to value yourself because you’re the only thing that you truly have. Everyone and everything else is a passerby. Like the two hit wonder, Dangerous Toys, they will fade into memory. Value your journey through this world and hold tight to the things that you hold sacred because it’s all going away at some point. It would be a shame for someone else to convince you that your treasure is trash when they’ve not looked at it through your eyes! Gold is not the only thing that glitters! And you don’t need to be golden to shine!

Hi ho silver!

Pete

Blogpost, self-reliance

Believe!

Pete Huryk

Believe!

Believe that you can!

Believe that you will!

Believe that no one can stop you!

Believe that the obstacles in front of you can be overcome!

Believe that people are silently cheering you on!

Believe that you have all the resources in you!

Believe that it’s only a matter of time!

Believe it will be as good as you hope!

Believe in who you are!

Believe trying is worth it!

Believe in miracles!

Believe in you!

Believe!

Be!

Pete

Blogpost, self-reliance

Time To Rewrite The Script

Pete Huryk

Don Cheadle replaced Terrence Howard as Colonel Rhodes in the second Iron Man movie and the story pressed on. Actors ad lib lines that become iconic. Scripts are thrown out mid-filming sometimes. It’s not that odd! Just another day in Hollywood! Or life!

As the chief script writer of your life, you need know when it’s time for a rewrite, cast change or plot twist. Life is just throwing scenery and actors at you. What are you going to do with them? That’s what you need to figure out. If you don’t like your role, then change it! That may not happen overnight like a training montage from a Rocky movie but it can happen.

The problem is that we tend to stick with the script that we have. Even if it’s not working, we’ve become attached to it. The characters, the setting, the vibe and tone can all start to feel right, even if your character is heading in the wrong direction. There is no “cut!” It’s full time action! So you’re going to need to do this rewrite basically on the fly but you can figure it out! Make your character into the vision that you have in your head!

Action!

Pete

Blogpost, self-reliance

Who Are You Talking To?

Pete Huryk

We live in a society where some things just aren’t ok. People obviously have different levels of tolerance for bad behavior but almost everyone has their threshold. Being around rude, degrading, insulting people is just not something that most will endure. Somehow, we turn a blind eye when talking to ourselves inside of our own head.

I can see why it might happen. No one can hear it and it’s you. So open up and let out! RIght? Cut loose! Lean into every single insecurity that you have. And then what? The one person that you need to live with for your entire life is beaten down. Seems like a losing strategy.

So remember who you’re talking to! It’s you! You’ve only got one you! You need to build you up! Not be delusional! Just keep it moving forward!

Talk it up!

Pete

Blogpost, self-reliance

Don’t Talk About the Streak

Pete Huryk

When you’re on a streak, you’re not supposed to talk about the streak! Just like the first rule of Fight Club. From my perspective, it’s not the talking about the streak that needs to be avoided. It’s idea that the streak is something that’s out there rather than inside. Streaks are a collection of positive results that are based on appropriate action. If you want to attribute them to a deity or luck or your unwashed socks, go for it! But you’re taking your hands off the wheel at that point.

The idea is not to stay silent on the streak. It’s to keep talking about the process. How did you get here and can you keep doing those actions? At it’s core, that is what needs to be done but at the extreme, everything is given value. So superstition springs out of consistency. Don’t give the jinxes power. Just show up consistently and the results will take care of themselves.

What streak?

Pete

Blogpost, self-reliance

Sunk Costs Can Sink You

Pete Huryk

The concept of sunk costs is pretty simple. Money, time, effort or any other currency that has already been spent is a “sunk cost.” Although you may have invested in something in the past, those resources are gone and cannot be recouped. Therefore using those costs to evaluate future decisions may not be helpful. Although they are usually thought of in financial terms, other currencies are just as likely to have sunk costs.

The overarching idea is that there are things that we need to release in this world. Hanging onto everything that we’ve ever valued is a poor strategy for forward motion because we will get weighed down. The object is not to throw away everything, just the dead weight that has accrued over time. Just because we put money, time, effort, etc into something at one point, doesn’t mean that it should continue. It only means that there was a value exchange at some point. Now is a new moment and may require reevaluation.

It’s time to rise to the surface! Hanging onto the sunk costs for too long will sink you. Now is the time to throw yourself a life preserver by deciding that your past decisions may not be a good indicator for what you need now.

Let go!

Pete

Blogpost, self-reliance

I Don’t Wanna!

Pete Huryk

That’s right! I’m ready to have a good old fashioned temper tantrum. Like a toddler who is exhausted but refuses to go to bed, I’m leaning into my own idiocy. It’s not my best state and in a very meta sense, I am watching myself from the outside. The question is, do I give in? Do I give into that base urge to emote rather than act?

Like so many of the problems that we all have, I know the answers but don’t particularly want to follow through on them. If all it took was knowing the right things to do, we’d all have six pack abs but we don’t because the knowledge isn’t enough. We also have to convince ourselves to do that which is necessary. And quite often as humans, we don’t wanna! As a functional human adult, I don’t get to stay in this state for long. I must snap myself out of it. The key to the change is decision. I need to decide to move forward.

That’s it! Nothing more from me tonight. Maybe you’re in the same position that I am. We could get together and have a pity party together but why don’t we just get going instead. Because at some point in the pity party, we’d both realize through the other person that we’re being quite ridiculous. Let’s get going!

Pete

Blogpost, self-reliance

It’s In The Way That You Use It

Pete Huryk

Although it’s not my favorite song (even by Eric Clapton), it has the ability to transport me to a time when I had fewer responsibilities and cares. I remember Tom Cruise in a t-shirt that just said “Vince” and swinging a pool cue like it was some kind of weapon. I’ve never seen the movie “The Color of Money” but the video paints a decent picture and adds a good visual to the song. Clapton latches onto the duality that shows up often in this world. The way that you use it is crucial. We have choices and need to see them.

Although I didn’t originally intend to write about 9/11, it seems to fit. There is obviously a lot of distance between that tragedy and the aftermath of war and sorrow. All of the students that I teach now weren’t even alive when it happened. So how does one look at an event that was reality but is now history? Did we use that moment in time correctly? I remember feeling an overwhelming sense of unity after that tragedy and now the divisiveness in our country seems to be the tragedy. People gave literal blood, sweat and tears. Now we seem to barely give a damn!

I’ve always been conflicted about 9/11 because although it was definitively a tragedy that I wish never happened, it brought my ex-wife and I together (not directly but circumstantially). Now I even have mixed emotions about that. But as the song says, it’s in the way that you use it. Tools can be used as weapons and vice versa. Our darkest hours can become the light that brightens the world but only if we use it correctly. We cannot wallow or whine and we must not forget. Yet we need to find the right mixture of remembrance with progress. If we are always living in the past then the wounds never heal and we cut ourselves with a weapon that could be a tool of hope.

So as you go through your day, many things will be thrown at you. Compliments, insults, opportunities, setbacks and like everything else, “it’s in the way that you use it! It comes and it goes. It’s in the way that you use it. Boy don’t you know! And if you lie you will lose it. Feelings will show. So don’t you ever abuse it. Don’t let it go!”

This is your shot! Don’t be afraid to take it!

Pete