In the 1970’s Philippe Petit walked a high wire strung between the Twin Towers in New York City. It was an amazing feat that was a result of a slow but steady progression of skill and daring over years. The film “Man On Wire” is a great documentary about the planning and execution of his walk. A slight warning that if you are afraid of heights, you may feel uneasy. Even though you are safe from any imminent danger, you may feel dizzy or tingly based on the images. I cannot imagine how Philippe Petit felt during the walk, over one thousand feet in the air without a net! Sure, he had years of experience and successful walks but the scale of this endeavor dwarfed everything else. It is easy to look at Philippe and say that he is special, talented or even crazy. Closer to the truth is probably that he was passionate about pursuing something to an extreme level. The use of a net negates the entire reason that he was walking in the first place. Under no circumstances and am I suggesting that a tight rope walk from dizzying height should be be in anyone’s future (I’m one of those people who tingles just seeing the photos). I am suggesting that the intersection of passion and stakes is a place of power. It’s someplace that we need to become more comfortable going to.
Unfortunately at the moment, we seem to be faced in the opposite direction. The formative years of youth and adolescence are spent with nothing but safety nets around. Whether it is literal foam padding to avoid injury or systems that are meant to insulate young people from failure, responsibility or any other stakes that could injure physically or emotionally. The dichotomy of these systems are interesting because they protect in the short term and potentially injure in the long term. Finding the balance of those two extremes is the name of the game. Philippe did not start out on the roof of the World Trade Center. Those stakes would have been overwhelming. His passion for walking the tight rope also would not have grown if he never went higher than six inches off the ground.
For each one of us, we have things that could grow into passions but we are afraid to raise the stakes. Failing, looking foolish and uncertainty are being trained out of our young people. We have given many young people a “safe space” but the counterweight needs to be put into place as well otherwise we do not have a creative space. All creation is messy, uncertain and possibly even dangerous. We are born from a series of chances taken with an element of risk. So to protect our future generations from that risk is robbing them of what is to be human.
As I often say to my players, “to be a leader, you need to go first”. So if you have young people in your life, be a model of a balance in both passion and risk. Perhaps you also need to break out of the foam rubber because comfort and security are things that many of us desire. Unfortunately they also allow for little emotional intensity which is what passion is all about. Go! Take a chance! Maybe even a small one and be an example for those onlookers who need someone to show them what is possible!
Philippe didn’t leap but he had to take a step off the edge and you can too!
Pete
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I remember playing soccer as a kid pretty vividly. There’s a smattering of games, practices, camps, travel and associated activities swimming around inside my head. Perhaps I’ve forgotten but there was only one time that I ever considered “quitting” soccer and that was near my transition to high school. However that was because I was considering going out for football. So other than that, I truly don’t have a recollection of not wanting to play anymore. Perhaps I’m wired differently because I also ran track through high school and into college. Basketball got left behind as a sophomore in high school. That was more of a “talent” and interest thing than burnout. When you’re getting the token minutes as a freshman, the writing is on the wall. I needed to get a lot better in order to be successful at the sport that was not my priority.
Every weekend the players line up on the field, the referee blows the whistle and the microscopes come out. I’m speaking figuratively of course. Although a fusion between youth sports and science would be great, I’m talking about the tunnel vision of the fans on the sidelines. It’s actually not their fault. It is in our nature to pay attention to the things that we care most about. So a parent’s focus on their child at a time of high emotion is both normal and expected. Our youth sports culture has definitely swung toward the extreme with cost, intensity and behavior. The thing that we often lack as we go through life is perspective. We tend to think that the way we perceive the world is the way that the world is. It is only our version. There are billions of others and none of them is completely correct either. So it may be valuable to gain a different perspective.
Every year I hike part of the Appalachian Trail with my brother. It is one of my favorite events of the year. First, it is time spent with one of my best friends. Second, it is enjoyable to forget about comfort for two days and walk into the woods with only the supplies we can carry. It’s not army survival training by any stretch but it’s not a picnic either. We never bring a picnic basket but we always bring a Swiss Army Knife. The tools that you pack on any adventure say a lot about what you are expecting, what you can handle and whether or not you’ll survive.
One of my greatest concerns is the youth of today are under-prepared to deal with the challenges they will face. I fear that in many respects kids today are walking into the woods with picnic baskets. They are anticipating that everything will continue to be easy. The tests of life will be multiple choice. If they need it, they’ll get extra time to complete their work. Mommy or daddy will always be available to fix their problems. Unfortunately this picnic basket life that they are anticipating doesn’t exist. What happens when they find out that life is not always a picnic?
Huryk Unlimited 