Blogpost, self-reliance

No One Cares About Your Problems (and neither should you)

This may come off a bit harsh but honestly, no one cares about your problems. Whether you’re overweight, your pet just died, your spouse left you, your candidate lost, or a thousand other issues, nobody cares and they shouldn’t! The truth of the matter is that your friends, family, co-workers, etc. don’t care about your problems, they care about you. So regardless of how many bad situations have aligned themselves against you, no one cares. Once this realization is solid inside of your head, the other shoe must drop. You shouldn’t care about your problems either. “But my debt….my dog….my boss….the election….the pandemic….”

My statement isn’t that you don’t have any problems. It’s only that you shouldn’t care about them. People tend to become invested in the negative situations that surround their lives. They invest tons of emotion into a situation that they wish would go away. It’s like giving keys to the person who keeps breaking into your house. Regardless of the situation, your attention and emotion are only feeding the problem itself or your perception of it. So is the answer to just ignore them? Not exactly! You shouldn’t care about your problems but…

You should care about the solutions because they need your time and attention. Much like a newborn baby, solutions don’t just take care of themselves. Someone has to keep them alive and allow them to grow until they are self-sufficient. Friends and family can definitely nurture a solution for you but let’s be honest, they are less likely to do it if they see that you’re in love with your problem.

People tend to get more of what they focus on, whether in perception or reality. The key is to focus on the things that you want and give only the attention that is necessary to the things that you don’t. The big bucks aren’t earned by people who are best at describing the problem. They’re earned by the people who find the solution.

Love your solutions today!



Let’s Get FAT!

GetFatI love languages!  There are so many subtle phrases and words that can be used to invoke emotion or provoke thought.  As we use them in our daily lives it is easy to forget that most of the words that we use are hundreds or even thousands of years old.  Often the meanings can change and words that are actually related become separated.  I was reminded of this as I was running today.  As usual, I was listening to a podcast and the host mentioned a “fatal error” made by a business.  My mind got stuck on that word “fatal” and I started to think of the other words that begin with FAT.  This word rabbit hole took me to five words that stuck out: fate, fatigue, faith, fathom and father.  This word salad got me to thinking about some of the processes that we all go through in life.

Any dream, project, calling or endeavor has to start from somewhere – the FATher.  The FATher is the seed, the idea, or the start that we all need.  Once we’ve begun, we need to have FAiTh because it is the fuel that keeps us going.  Belief in the unseen at a time when there is little or no evidence that things will work out.  FATigue is the feeling thing that we will feel through all of the work that is required.  Then there is FATe which is the thing that is preordained.  It cannot be stopped because it was just meant to be.  There is fathom which can be a type of measurement but more importantly it is to gain understanding.  Then for better or worse, we end at the word that started this thought exercise – FATal.  As I looked up the origins of the word FATal, it was exactly what I thought it would be.  In the late 14th century it was used to mean “decreed by fate”.  I suppose the word took a pessimistic turn and it was only applied to the one thing that most people thought was decreed by fate.  So what does this have to do with you or I?

We all need to get FAT.  We need to plant the seeds of our wildest dreams.  Then we need to feed them with an unwavering faith in the fact that they will be realized.  The actions need to be taken that lock in the absolute certainty of our desire will wear us out.  Eventually the people who talk about us and what we have done will say that it was destiny.  Gaining a better understanding of ourselves or the world through what we’ve done.  All things come to and end but if we are willing to get FAT perhaps they’ll meet the end that we want.

So go get FAT today.