Blogpost, self-reliance

The Argument That You Will Always Lose

I grew up in an era when spanking your child was not only ok, it was basically the norm. This is not a post to aggrandize or demonize the practice. It just was how things were. So this story comes with 0.000 moral judgment. The last spanking that I ever received was when I was around 8-10 years old. To be honest, I don’t even remember what it was for. However, I do remember the experience because of my own absolutely stupid strategy of how I dealt with it. I took the first swat on my rear end and said “That didn’t hurt.” The second one came and again I repeated, “That didn’t hurt.” About five times in as the impact on my butt was getting harder, it sunk in. This was a stupid strategy. I was increasing my own pain for absolutely no reason.

It’s an odd phenomena but I actually run into people who suffer from a similar poor strategy quite often. This is mainly due to my position in life as a teacher and coach. However I run into adults with the same exact issue. Arguing for our limitations is a dangerous game to play that only ends up hurting us. Although I’m pointing it out and want to help people stop it, I’m also guilty of it as well. Most of the time, we’re completely oblivious to it. Words like “can’t” show up in our speech without much thought. We hope that situations change and so that we won’t really have to. Our vision is clouded by who we’ve always been, who our parents are, where we come from and a variety of other factors that are a barrier between us and something we want. Unfortunately the bricks in that wall have usually been laid or at least approved by the same person who is complaining about the wall.

Sure! People have advantages and there are always obstacles that need to be moved past. Don’t put yourself onto that list of obstacles. Your beliefs about what you are capable of doing can be a springboard to take you to higher heights or an anchor that drags you to deeper depths. At the moment, I’m not asking for you to believe that the big thing is destined to happen. For now, I just want you to believe that it is “possible”. If you start there and put out the effort, it might become “probable”. Be careful though, if you believe enough and take major action, it might just become “inevitable”. That’s really scary though! Because if you tried and failed, then you’d really know what you’re capable of doing. It might be far beyond what you’re doing now but believing that you can’t is much easier.

You have limits but acting like you know them is far different than running into them!